tag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:/blogs/the-joyful-culture-warrior-blog?p=3The Joyful Culture Warrior Blog2023-04-28T17:09:03-06:00Dr. Nancy Williamsfalsetag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71995242023-04-28T17:09:03-06:002023-11-15T20:04:07-07:00Going through the Hard<p>It happens at least once, if not regularly in every musician's career. I see it regularly in my most diligent students. When they are working on a concept and it just isn't happening, they feel like they're not making any progress. In reality, they're progress is imperceptible in real time, but it's part of a larger picture. These students are working hard, practicing all the things they need to get where they want, but they feel stuck, with no discernable improvement week to week.<br><br>And then it happens in a moment. Something clicks. All of a sudden, they're performing <i>a lot</i> better and able to execute whatever concept they'd been struggling with.<br><br>Sound familiar? Do you feel like you're struggling day after day and getting nowhere? Feeling stuck?<br><br>Keep wanting, trying, experimenting, and <i>living</i>.<br><br>The answer is just around the corner. The trouble is that you don't know which corner and you can't see it coming! </p><p>This is what I call “going through the hard.” It's putting one foot in front of the other and suspending judgment. It's easy to become obsessed with progress at this time, so get perspective by doing things you enjoy outside of work and trying new things. </p><p>If “the hard” gets hard enough, that's often a type of breaking point that forces you into actions you normally wouldn't take (but apparently <i>need</i>). That's turning a corner right there.</p><p>If you are lucky enough to go through this period with someone you can trust, you'll most likely create a lifelong bond. It's all part of the journey. You can't have flowers without rain.</p><hr><p><i>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and leadership coach for musicians and creatives wanting more joy and empowerment and less </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><i>imposter syndrome</i></a><i> and </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed"><i>overwhelm</i></a><i>.</i></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71932112023-04-19T12:42:41-06:002023-04-19T12:42:41-06:00The Most Important Thing to do When Overwhelmed<p>Having too much work to do is nothing new, but the post-pandemic world seems to have even more responsibilities attached to it. This could be because stress takes a toll on the brain's ability to process at usual speed, but there may actually be more work to do, depending on your field. As musicians, my friends and I are so happy to be able to perform live again that the tendency is to overbook.<br><br>Whatever the reason for your increased workload, the <i>feeling</i> of being <a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed">overwhelmed</a> can drastically reduce your quality of life. You can lose the ability to make decisions strategically and end up wasting time on things that aren't the priority you think they are. Or the opposite may be true…you're paralyzed by thoughts of your to-do list and end up procrastinating because you don't seem to be able to start <i>anything</i> that requires productivity.<br><br>These are both the body's response to being <a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed">overwhelmed</a>. It's not your fault. There is nothing wrong with you. The guilt you may be experiencing by not getting as much done as you think you should may be adding to your stress, though, so try to stop that cycle of judgement.<br><br>When you feel yourself start to spiral in either of those directions, there is one technique that can help you be productive in spite of it. You can keep yourself from making poor decisions that end up in wasted time. You can keep yourself from becoming paralyzed and getting nothing productive done. This is your life. Own that you're in charge.<br><br>What's the one thing? Sit down and shut up. Seriously, sit in a room without distractions and just breathe. Clarity will come. Inspiration will come. The longer you wait to do this, the longer it will take to get to that point. <br><br>Yes, there's more to overcoming long-term feelings of overwhelm. That's why I devised a course on digging deep to bulletproof yourself from burnout, which is what chronic overwhelm can become. Sign up for my<a class="no-pjax" href="/newsletter" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Newsletter"> newsletter</a> to be notified of when that course (Overwhelmed to Overjoyed) will be offered again.<br> </p><hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who specializes in helping musicians and creatives build cultures of joy that increase productivity and empowerment.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71851232023-04-06T10:04:26-06:002023-04-06T10:29:01-06:00How I Managed Feelings of "Barely Hanging On" While on Tour<p>I just completely a month-long lecture and performing tour. The first week was the heaviest, with two lectures I'd never given before and a residency with a major performance. After that, I had some down time over the weekend, but I had to complete a grant application that was due in the coming weeks. Yes, my body was stressed by travel and the upending of my routine, but I felt in charge of the situation.<br><br>The next leg of tour is where things went wrong. I had scheduled three lectures back-to-back at two different institutions on the same day I traveled to the area. Traveling to work is not ideal, I realized on this tour, but my critical mistake was not allowing time for dinner. By eight o-clock that evening, I was exhausted and starving, not an ideal situation for an already-stressed body. <br><br>The next couple of days were rough. I felt like I was barely hanging on, unable to anticipate problems or plan for the next gig. At some point, I made a decision to stop feeling badly about that and let go, let go of the internal pressure, let go of the need to feel in charge, let go of the need to manage potential problems. That meant I had to start trusting more.<br><br>I trusted the Universe and the people in it to keep me from harm, my car to not break down (and if it did, that I had structures in place to manage that), my colleagues and friends to be gracious and forgiving, and for all the preparation and planning I'd done ahead of time to be good enough. Essentially, I'd decided not only to live day-to-day, but minute-to-minute. The choice seemed clear: let go or break.<br><br>That's where the magic happened. I might not have felt physically or mentally at my best (far from it, actually), but I was more open to the experiences being placed in front of me, not the ones I had created or expected. (I'd had to let go of expectations as well.) I gave myself extra time to get to venues, not trusting my ability to navigate at this point, and got everywhere right on time. Nothing was perfect, but all was as it should be. Ultimately, I prioritized self-care over everything, not in a selfish or demanding way, but as a means for survival. I still had plenty of performing and lectures to do, but I discovered that me at 50% was still achieving the essentials. I noticed that my colleagues all had their own struggles, and that this semester was pretty rough for every musician. We all needed grace and compassion.<br><br>Most of that time is a blur now. I proved to myself that I could go on an extended tour, physically and mentally. My biggest takeaway was an ego-adjustment on my part. Most people outside of the lecture hall wanted to be heard, not hear from me. I had to remember how important it was to really listen to people (even when I'm not coaching!) without an agenda. I no longer needed to prove anything to myself. I was enough. Tour was overall really hard, but there were some absolutely brilliant moments which I will hold dear forever. (More on that later.)<br><br>My advice to you if you want it is to do the hard stuff. Stop thinking so much. Accept that you can't anticipate every problem or outcome and that that's the beauty of it. Let go and get out there! And then practice radical self-care. You are your biggest and best investment!</p><hr><p><a class="no-pjax" href="/home" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Home"><i>Dr. Nancy Williams</i></a><i> is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who specializes in helping creatives </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed"><i>overcome overwhelm</i></a><i> and </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><i>imposter syndrome</i></a><i> to build an empowered and joyful life and career.</i></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71815142023-03-30T18:55:06-06:002023-03-30T18:55:06-06:00Do This Not That When Programming Diversity into Your Repertoire<p>This post is for my musician friends and is inspired by the wonderful culture and repertoire I was exposed to during the International Music by Women Festival I recently attended. The vast majority of attendees were there to support and share music they loved that was written by women composers. The purity of that ideal, as opposed to a look-at-what-I-can-do culture that can take hold in some settings, was uplifting. In short, less ego, more love.<br><br>So here are three examples of how we can grow to program and perform repertoire that is more than diverse, repertoire that reflects inclusion and belonging…<br> </p><p>Do This…<br>Do search out pieces by marginalized communities until you find something that resonates with you. Be excited to introduce the audience to these pieces that you love.</p><p>Not that…<br>Don't program a token work written by a minority that is a novelty piece. That sends the message that minorities don't create serious works.<br> </p><p>Do this…<br>Do introduce the audience to the merits of your chosen repertoire through program notes or a verbal introduction.</p><p>Not that…<br>Don't focus on the merits of the traditional canon within your repertoire then only address biographical information on composers from marginalized communities. This sends the message that the pieces have been chosen because the composers are minorities, not because of the quality of their compositions.</p><p><br>Do this…<br>Do continue to seek out music that stretches your idea of good taste. Your taste is informed by your own culture. Get to know what other cultures and generations find appealing and why. </p><p>Not that…<br>Don't settle on one or a few composers whose music makes you feel comfortable. Your audience deserves to see themselves reflected in the music as much as you do. At the very least, your audience deserves to know that there is a world of repertoire out there that may be different than they are used to, and that that's okay. Different isn't bad.</p><p><br>So there you have it. The world is a big, beautiful place with a myriad of voices who reflect their values in unexpected ways. You and your audience deserve to be exposed to these as much as these voices deserve to be heard. It's not about the extra work it may take to find pieces with which you're not familiar or styles that may not understand; it's a privilege and a joy to unearth the voices of like souls who may express themselves in unfamiliar ways but still speak to the core of our united humanity.</p><hr><p><a class="no-pjax" href="/about-me" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="About Me"><i>Dr. Nancy Williams</i></a><i> is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who helps creatives overcome </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><i>imposter syndrome </i></a><i>and </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed"><i>overwhelm </i></a><i>so that they can live and work in cultures of joy and empowerment.</i></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71774792023-03-23T14:54:54-06:002023-03-23T14:54:55-06:00Post-Pandemic Healing<p>Being on tour for 5 weeks was a wake-up call to just how traumatized we all are as a nation. No one is at their best, and I found myself choosing grace over and over again for myself and others because we're all still recovering from the past several years of cultural and personal trauma. Although I'm not a health professional, I don't think the theory that we're all suffering from a mild case of Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome is far from the truth.<br><br>The Mayo Clinic has a list of <a class="no-pjax" href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20355967" target="_blank" data-link-type="url"><u>PTSD symptoms</u></a> that may sound familiar. While some categories cover intense responses to triggers from the traumatic event(s), others include negative thought-patterns and moods as well as challenging physical and emotional responses to stress. Let's take a look at some of those, many of which also relate to depression:</p><ul>
<li>Hopelessness </li>
<li>Memory problems</li>
<li>Difficulty maintaining close relationships</li>
<li>Feeling detached from family and friends</li>
<li>Lack of interest in activities you once enjoyed</li>
<li>Difficulty experiencing positive emotions</li>
<li>Feeling emotionally numb</li>
<li>Trouble sleeping</li>
<li>Trouble concentrating</li>
</ul><p>Another <a class="no-pjax" href="https://www.ptsd.va.gov/gethelp/negative_coping.asp" target="_blank" data-link-type="url">article published on the Veteran's Affairs website</a> addresses negative coping skills related to the syndrome, such as avoiding others, feeling guarded, and working too much. <br><br>I'm not proposing that we are collectively experiencing PTSD, but rather that we can benefit from the following <a class="no-pjax" href="https://screening.mhanational.org/content/what-can-i-do-recover-ptsd-my-own/?layout=actions_a" target="_blank" data-link-type="url"><u>recovery methods</u> Mental Health America suggests</a>:</p><ul>
<li>
<strong>Connect with friends and family. </strong><br> </li>
<li>
<strong>Relax.</strong><br> </li>
<li>
<strong>Exercise.</strong> <br> </li>
<li>
<strong>Get enough rest. </strong><br> </li>
<li>
<strong>Keep a journal. </strong><br> </li>
<li><strong>Limit TV watching.</strong></li>
</ul><p>How many symptoms do you have? How many of the recovery methods are you using? If your symptoms outnumber your coping mechanisms, now may be the time to get moving, connecting, and learning to really live again.</p><hr><p><i>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and coach for creatives who want </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed"><i>less overwhelm</i></a><i> and </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><i>imposter syndrome</i></a><i> so that they can have more empowerment and joy.</i></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71616922023-02-27T13:32:30-07:002023-03-10T03:24:21-07:00Weakness, Faults, and Perfectionism<p>If you are or have ever been a perfectionist, you know what it's like to keep your weaknesses a secret. You don't want anyone else to find out that you're not 100% all of the time or that you don't know ALL the things. This practice is unattainable if you're a human, which I'm presuming is the case if you're reading this.<br><br>Even if you can keep yourself from revealing your weaknesses to others, you'll eventually get tired enough or sick enough or overwhelmed enough to let something slip through for all to see. You'll think this is a bad thing, but it isn't. Having weaknesses and faults is human. What you do with them determines your character, and in some ways, your success in your career and life.</p><p><strong>First of all, you can't improve on your weaknesses if you don't acknowledge them.</strong> If your inner voice is criticizing you every time you make a mistake, it may be time for some self-assessment. Separating your ego from your strengths and weaknesses fosters improvement without judgment. Being your own cheerleader only works if you have goals to make. Being perfect is unattainable. Make the game about building stronger character.</p><p><strong>Secondly, being comfortable enough in your humanity to show others your faults will defuse any attempt to use your faults against you. </strong>This isn't about self-effacement or self-flagellation. Being honest about parts of you that need work can keep the haters at a distance. You've taken their ammunition away.<br><br><strong>Thirdly, embracing that you're on a journey of continual growth and recognizing that you will always have weaknesses to work on, makes you relatable and accessible to others. </strong>When you're able to embrace your imperfectionism, you're able to forgive others their faults as well. Humans are messy and complicated. We're never going to get it right all the time. <br><br> </p><hr><p><i>Dr. NancyWilliams is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who specializes in helping performers create cultures of joy and empowerment by </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed"><i>overcoming overwhelm</i></a><i> and </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" target="_blank" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><i>imposter syndrome.</i></a><br><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71578422023-02-21T10:02:56-07:002023-02-21T10:02:56-07:00An Exercise in Humility<p>The expenses of going on tour can be high, so I'm staying with friends and relatives when I can. It's been a long time since I've stayed in someone else's home. The experiences is fostering humility, since I'm an outsider. No matter how gracious my hosts are, the change of setting and ownership creates vulnerability on my part.</p><p>Often, you're more flexible when you're younger. There's even the saying about being “set in your ways” as you age. You stop putting outself in circumstances that are uncomfortable. You stop seeing different ways things can be done. (My sister has a soap dispenser that's part of her kitchen sink. I didn't know that was a thing!) When you step outside of our comfort zone, you have the opportunity to gain a different perspective, vulnerability, and humility.</p><p>You can lose the ability to see things clearly if you're not interacting with others. This happened a lot during the pandemic in particular. Humans are social creatures and social learning influences our behaviors and mindset. Social learning is powerful. You may know a lot, but you'll never realize how much you don't know until you have conversations. </p><p>Placing myself at the mercy of the generosity of others during this tour has been a good reminder that we need each other, and that's a pretty humbling construct if you pride yourself on your independence. The pandemic was divisive in many ways, but mostly it divided us physically from each other and the immense benefits that gives us emotionally, socially, and mentally. Asking to stay in someone's home is an exercise in humility particularly when you haven't seen these people in years. This post-pandemic experience is universal, I expect, as we remember how to connect and embrace each other's differences.</p><hr><hr><p><a class="no-pjax" href="/home" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Home"><i>Dr. Nancy Williams</i></a><i> is a musician, educator, and coach who specializes in helping musicians create cultures of joy and empowerment so that they can lead their careers and lives with </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><i>more confidence</i></a><i> and </i><a class="no-pjax" href="/overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="overwhelmed"><i>less stress</i></a><i>.</i></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71557982023-02-17T08:09:18-07:002023-02-17T08:09:18-07:00Leadership amidst Tragedy<p>This blog was supposed to be a lighthearted reminscence of my first week on tour, my first major extended travel in years after battling chronic pain and a stomach infection. Indeed, there have been many joyous moments, but I didn't anticipate (and who ever does) how tragedy would touch those I care about and how fundamental leadership is in those sitations.</p><p>My first destination was staying at a friend's house during the South Dakota Music In-Service. I was excited to see old friends and present a new lecture for the first time. We'd just sat down to a lovely meal my friend made. She'd taken into account my food sensitivity issues, and I was overwhelmed with gratitude. This was an amazing act of generosity and hospitality.</p><p>I had maybe one bite of dinner when the phone rang from an unexpected source. So I answered and learned of the sudden passing of a fellow clarinetist, friend, and my cats' favorite sitter. She'd been part of the community clarinet choir I'd founded and lead for 10 years, but we'd disbanded during the pandemic. Some of the other members of the group messaged and even called that day, and I was reminded of the lasting impact of leadership. My role was clear - listen, give them space to process and grieve. </p><p>The next day, I received a text from a student I had mentored years ago. A student of her own was performing in a band festival, and their mother died in a car accident on the way to watch the concert. Ugh. I did my best to remind her that nothing about it was her fault, but my heart ached for her and the family.</p><p>Then I was reminded of the difficult times in my life when I reached out for counsel from my mentors, when I sought comfort from leadership from my past. These people had done it right. They made me feel so safe and instilled such a sense of belonging that decades later, I still feel that way in their presense. They are part of my professional family, of sorts. Music is wonderfully weird like that. Creating music together is a bonding experience.<br> </p><p><strong>You don't have to be perfect as a leader. You're going to make mistakes. We all do. It's the human condition. </strong></p><p><span class="text-big"><i>It's the way you make people feel that matters and that will have a profound impact on their lives. </i></span></p><hr><p><span class="text-small">Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who specializes in helping creatives overcome imposter syndrome and confidence issues in order to have a more joyful and empowering career. Sign up for her newsletter and get the free guide, “3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome” </span><a class="no-pjax" href="/subscribe" data-link-type="page" data-link-label="Subscribe"><span class="text-small">here.</span></a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71377172023-01-13T14:58:02-07:002023-02-03T15:12:36-07:00A Semester of Rejections<p>Last August, I was sure I was going to get this one job...until I didn't. Surprised by the sting of rejection (I'm a musician after all, and I know from experience that I'm not going to win every audition), I decided to embark on an entire semester of putting myself out there so boldly that every rejection would be a win for my bravery.<br><br><span class="font_large">Here's what I learned...</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<strong>It's not personal. </strong><br> Whether or not I got a job or a gig or a student wasn't up to me. It depended on lots of variables: if there was funding available, if I was the right fit, if schedules aligned, etc. People aren't saying no to you; they're saying no to your proposal, your ask, your offer. When people say no, it's not about you.<br> <br> That was the point of the whole rejection experiment for me. Could I get rejected enough times so that I wouldn't take it personally anymore? The answer is yes, and no. Absolutely, this was a transformative experience in that I truly no longer care if someone tells me no. There have been times, though, when the reason behind the rejection did elicit an emotional response, like frustration.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>With intention comes clarity.</strong><br> There are no end to the number of things for which you can apply, be it jobs or grants or opportunities. When the world is your oyster of rejections, you realize pretty early on that you have to figure out what you really want. You have to focus your energy in the direction of opportunities that make your heart sing. <br> <br> This semester made me get in touch with what I really wanted. I have a lot of different jobs within my portfolio career, and my mission to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world unites them all. Sometimes I achieve my mission through teaching music, sometimes coaching, or performing, but I realized that there was a common theme not only to WHAT my mission was, but HOW I needed to achieve it. That underlying theme was education. Even when I'm composing, I'm thinking of how to educate my audience. By the end of the semester, I realized that, for me to be truly happy, I needed to focus on opportunities that included an educational component.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Get out of your way.</strong><br> Whatever is keeping you from achieving your goals becomes more obvious. It may be a limited mindset, physical ailments, or other issues. These challenges become clearer and bigger when you're putting yourself out there in a big way. It's like you're going into battle.<br> <br> In my situation, I had to overcome some erroneous perceptions, but I also had to get to the bottom of my health issues. The urgency of being able to perform my job at the highest level made me realize that my health was holding me back, so I kept pushing my doctors to figure out what was going on with my gut. I finally got diagnosed with a stomach infection. Getting treated for that has made my energy levels soar. I'd been accepting feeling sub-par for so long, I hadn't realized how bad it had gotten. The semester of rejection put a spotlight onto what was holding me back.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Some things fix themselves.</strong><br> This is actually something I've learned before, but I apparently needed a reminder. It's part of the human condition to want immediate responses. For me, I'm really good at making things happen. When you're putting yourself out there, however, you need to give people time to consider your ask. It doesn't do any good to follow-up quickly, although follow-ups are definitely necessary. It can make you appear needy, and that impression can illicit a negative response. In short, needy is creepy.<br> <br> Give the Universe a chance to be on your side, to do some magic on your behalf. There's peace to be had in letting go. You can't control other people's responses or even what they think of you. Do your thing, then see what comes your way. People can surprise you if you let them. The Universe can, too.</li>
</ol>
<p>I could make this blog a lot longer. My semester of rejections was a transformative experience with intangible benefits that I suspect will follow for years to come. I'm proud of myself for doing this experience, and I'm humbled, but not necessarily in ways I'd anticipated. Instead of feeling humbled by the rejections, I'm humbled by the strangers who saw the value in what I do without knowing me personally. I'm humbled by the opportunities that opened up in unexpected ways. Lastly, I'm humbled by the incredible support from my team. If you should embark on such an experiment yourself, level up your support first. </p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who helps creatives lead their lives and careers in a way that brings them joy and empowerment. Get her free guide "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" <a contents="here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here</a> and receive weekly email messages of inspiration and leadership tips.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/71339112023-01-06T11:29:33-07:002023-01-06T11:29:33-07:00How to Pick and Use a Word of the Year <p>The word of the year trend has increased in popularity recently. I started participating in the trend in 2022, not as much by choice, but by a nudge from the Universe. The word "trust" pushed its way into my brain when I asked myself, "What word would I even choose? This seems stupid."<br><br>My word for 2023 is "kindness" for pretty much the same reason. There was no question this time. Kindness is what I feel I need most, especially from myself. I suspect as I fill my own need for kindness, I'll be able to increase in kindness towards others. <br> </p>
<p><span class="font_large">Here's why the word of the year works:</span></p>
<p>It gives a clear, simple focus for the long term. No being overwhelmed and pulled in a million different directions. Just one word. For me, "trust" became a mantra when I was feeling stressed or confused. I grew to let go of my worries about uncertainty as time went on. <br> </p>
<p><span class="font_large">How do you pick a word of the year?</span></p>
<p>Let the word pick you. If it's not happening, don't start a word of the year on New Year's Day. That's right - you can start a word of the year anytime. <br><br>How do you let the word pick you? Let your mind wander when you're doing simple tasks or chores. Keep a journal. Meditate on the question. Allow the word to find you by making yourself available to hear it.<br><br>Want something a little less <em>woowoo</em>? Make a list of words that are important to you. It can be an action word or a feeling or a noun. Then go through the list on a different day, circling the ones that speak to you the most. Eventually narrow it down to one word.<br><br><br>You have all the answers already within yourself. The word of the year shouldn't be something you <em>have</em> to do. It shouldn't add stress or create more work to do. If you decide to choose one, you don't even have to share it with anyone. A word of the year is personal and meaningful to you. No one else needs to understand.<br><br> </p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a freelance music educator and leadership coach based out of Rapid City, SD. She specializes in helping creatives overcome imposter syndrome and build empowerment and joy into their lives and careers. Download the free guide <a contents='"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"' data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"</a> and receive weekly emails of inspiration.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/70994552022-11-10T10:44:59-07:002022-11-10T10:44:59-07:00How to Give Colleagues Feedback<p>Nobody likes unsolicited advice, right?</p>
<p>However, in a work environment, sometimes addressing a quality performance issue is necessary. You don't have to be in a leadership position to get the desired result, but you may need to emotionally regulate yourself to keep it from escalating to a conflict.<br><br><strong><span class="font_large">Here's a quick example:</span></strong><br><br><strong>Problem:</strong><br>When performing in an ensemble, I noticed that the person playing a part similar to mine was consistently performing the wrong articulation.<br><br>Understanding circumstances:<br>I asked the person if we could compare parts to see if there was a misprint.<br>This was a legitimate inquiry, since misprints are fairly common. <br><br>Getting to the reason behind a quality issue is important. Don't make assumptions. Understanding the problem fully is critical to solving it.<br><br><strong>Reaction:</strong><br>In this case, there was not a misprint<br>and the person firmly denied ever playing it incorrectly.<br><br>Most of the time, the person is happy to have the inconsistency pointed out, but in other cases, the person may have difficulties accepting feedback OR you may be inaccurate in your assessment. Invite them to help you understand the context and help fix the problem.<br><br><strong>Solution:</strong><br>The part was performed correctly after that. <br><br>So I had to take a bit of verbal backlash, BUT the outcome elevated the ensemble. There was also no lasting damage to the professional relationship between the two of us. </p>
<p><strong>Why not get leadership involved?</strong><br>Egos can get bruised much easier when private feedback becomes public feedback. Also, this was a small issue that was easily handled between the two of us. <br><br>When a colleague has a delicate ego, you'll have to ask yourself if it's worth it for you to speak up or if you should get leadership involved. <u>Learning to manage these situations and these types of colleagues is a skill worth developing in order to save time and trouble.</u><br><br><strong>Here's the trick:</strong><br>You have to be able to say these things with a sense of humility and the goal of improving quality. If you are trying to look better than or compete with a colleague, this will pervade every word and action. It may be better to have someone else, a common colleague or leadership, address the issue.</p>
<p>Most colleagues want the same thing as you do: a quality product that represents the best of your team. Keeping the big picture in mind will help you from taking any negative reaction personally. Small problems can be fixed easily as long as everyone keeps their ego in check and has the team's best interest in mind.</p>
<hr><p><span class="font_regular"><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator, freelance performer, and leadership coach whose mission is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world. Insecure about your abilities? Grab the free guide "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" <a contents="here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here</a>.</em></span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/70846772022-10-19T14:31:18-06:002022-10-31T06:21:42-06:00Three "Do This Not That" to Approach Conflict<p>Most of my life was spent being conflict-averse. I hated the thought of hurting anyone's feelings, and dreaded any type of heated emotion. Fast forward to my forties, and I had a serious case of self-abandonment from not speaking out. I had betrayed myself by not sharing when my feelings were hurt, by <a contents="being pleasant just to keep the peace" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed">being pleasant just to keep the peace</a>, and by <a contents="valuing other people's time and feelings more than my own" data-link-label="HowToSayNoReplay" data-link-type="page" href="/howtosaynoreplay" target="_blank">valuing other people's time and feelings more than my own</a>.<br><br>What I discovered, through forcing myself to voice my opinion, is that addressing conflict...</p>
<ul> <li>doesn't have to have heated emotions</li> <li>can bring about positive solutions</li> <li>can be a source of healing as opposed to hurting</li>
</ul>
<p><u><span class="font_large">Here are three ways to get the best results out of conflict:</span></u></p>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Do keep your emotions in check. Don't take things personally. </strong>Angry, frustrated, hurt, or irritated people can say and do things that aren't nice. This has nothing to do with you. Reacting defensively will only cause more tension. Let others own their own feelings; you don't need to take them on.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Do speak about your feelings, needs, and experiences, not about what others have or haven't done. Don't blame others. </strong>Everyone is human. Everyone makes mistakes...but not everyone is capable of acknowledging this. There are always at least two sides to every story. Listening and acknowledging additional points of view empowers others to listen and acknowledge yours.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Do look for team solutions. Don't focus on problems. </strong>No one wants to dwell on the negative. Keep the focus on problem-solving not people-changing to minimize defensiveness. It's all about solutions not venting all of your grievances. Let that stuff go.</li>
</ul>
<p>The purpose of conflict is to create empathy and awareness about how actions effect others and how viewpoints differ; the ultimate outcome is to embrace solutions. Keeping that the focus of the conversation is key. We often expect others to intuitively understand how we feel, but that's often not the case. People are focusing on their own needs and often unaware of any conflict. <em>One of the best ways to enter into a conversation is to come prepared with suggestions or solutions.</em></p>
<hr><p><span class="font_regular"><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a musician, educator, and leadership coach who's mission is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world.</em></span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/70171672022-07-18T12:26:37-06:002022-10-16T20:25:06-06:00How to Prepare for Meetings (and Rehearsals!) that Matter<p>Do you hate meetings? If that was a "yes" before the pandemic, I'm guessing it's an "absolutely yes, OMG so much yes" now. <a contents=" Overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank"> </a><a contents="Overwhelm" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Overwhelm</a> and burnout have become a fact of life for many.<br><br>But what if you're in charge of meetings? It can be challenging to keep everyone's attention, much less inspire your team to follow through with what needs to be done.<br><br>Preparing for a meeting can be just as important as actually running one. </p>
<p><em><strong><span class="font_large">Here are three things that you can do ahead of time to make meetings pain free:</span></strong></em></p>
<p><strong><u>Get organized.</u></strong><br>Figure out the main point(s) that you need to get across. Now make an outline (in whatever form is most comfortable for you) with that as the introduction <em>and</em> conclusion. Fill in the outline with supporting material. Check to see if you can make the information clearer or if it's truly necessary. If not, delete. You want everything you say to be clear and concise. Running a rehearsal instead of a meeting? Create a plan and prioritize.</p>
<p><u><strong>Ask for input.</strong></u><br>Go to team leaders and ask if anything needs to be addressed that has not yet been included.<br>Conductors, this applies to you as well. You may be surprised at what your section leaders are noticing that would help you problem-solve.<br><br><u><strong>Get the right people there.</strong></u><br>Only invite the people who <em>need</em> to be there. It's a need-to-know world right now. If you are including superfluous personnel, you are wasting their time and energy and negatively effecting productivity. Musicians, can you accomplish more in a sectional than a full rehearsal?<br><br>Planning is an opportunity to trim any unnecessary information so that your team can get the most out of their time. Empowering your team through input increases their investment while allow you to get a fresh perspective. Prioritizing what needs the most attention and identifying the specific people involved will help save everyone's patience and productivity.<br> </p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a clarinetist, music educator, and leadership & life coach who helps leaders and creatives build cultures of empowerment that increase productivity and joy. <a contents="Sign up" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">Sign up</a> to receive weekly blog links and an inspirational message and receive the free guide, <a contents='"5 Ways to Overcome Overwhelm."' data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">"5 Ways to Overcome Overwhelm."</a></em><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/70122122022-07-11T11:49:24-06:002022-07-11T11:49:25-06:00Building Respect in Professional Relationships<p>Attending ClarinetFest, the International Clarinet Association's annual conference, this year was extraordinary. To be around like-minded people who are excited about what they're creating and performing is an inspirational boost, not to mention hearing all of the absolutely amazing music. This year had the added bonus of being the first live convention since the pandemic, and we jokingly refer to it at ClarinetLoveFest because it filled that ache in our hearts left by not being able to share with, create with and perform for our peers in-person for over two years.<br><br>This ClarinetFest was different in another way as well, since I've been curating connections with clarinetists for several years online. For many of us, it was the first time we'd met in person. <br><br><em><strong>I've never felt so professionally respected, which led to a surge of creativity in my business.</strong></em><br><br>Now that I've had time to digest our interactions,<br><span class="font_regular">I've categorized the actions that built the kind of respect that's inspiring...</span></p>
<p><span class="font_large">Here are four ways you can give others the gift of respect and encourage their professional growth.</span><br><br><span class="font_regular"><u><strong>Inclusion</strong></u></span><br>Being a part of something is powerful. Equality is a part of this equation. There were clarinetists of all ages and abilities and all were welcome. (We're still working on the minority gap in classical clarinet music and in our trade organizations, but we're on the path.) Introductions and invitations were plentiful and helped to fuel that positive group ethos. </p>
<p><strong><u>Listening</u></strong><br>People who are<a contents=" confident" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe"> confident</a> in themselves and their abilities have nothing to prove. This frees up to ego to be curious about others and their contributions. We wanted to know when and what our colleagues were performing. We wanted to hear their stories.<br><br><u><strong>Empathy</strong></u><br>There was a tacet understanding of the hardships we've had to endure the past few years because of the impact of cancellations of live music and music events. Truly almost any classical musician has had particular challenges with which we can empathize, especially during the pandemic. This lack of judgment quickens the path to understanding and respect.<br><br><u><strong>Lifting Up</strong></u><br>To have enough confidence to be able to truly be present and listen to someone is powerful, but the next step is to be able to lift up your colleagues without any concern for how that could effect yourself professionally. All voices matter, and we all hold a unique place. Promoting someone else's achievements and celebrating their journey reflects the ultimate confidence you have in your own.<br><br>Was ClarinetFest 2022 perfect? Of course not, but for me it was the perfect moment in time to realize how I'd progressed as a clarinetist and a human. That's what had allowed me to attract the type of colleagues who were similar in professional philosophy. The joy in that kind of respect is what professionalism is all about.<br> </p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a <a contents="musician" data-link-label="Nancy Williams, clarinetist" data-link-type="page" href="/nancy-williams-clarinetist" target="_blank">musician</a> and <a contents="leadership &amp; life coach" data-link-label="Leadership Coach" data-link-type="page" href="/leadership-coach" target="_blank">leadership & life coach</a> who helps creatives build cultures of joy and empowerment. She specializes in <a contents="beating imposter syndrome" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">beating imposter syndrome</a> and <a contents="overcoming overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overcoming overwhelm</a>.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/70016712022-06-25T15:01:42-06:002022-06-25T15:01:42-06:00Four Ways to Lead Through Action<p>Actions speak louder than words, or so the saying goes. While the truth of this may depend more on the listener, the power of actions will undoubtedly be influential on those who are more aware, pay attention to details, and see the big picture. These are the type of people you need around you, so you want to make sure to attract them to your team.</p>
<p>Here are four ways to lead through action:</p>
<ol> <li>Follow through on what you say you'll do.<br> Being true to your words by acting on them shows people that you can be trusted. Trust is a keystone to influential leadership. Don't do what you say you will and others will feel unsupported and unheard.<br> </li> <li>No job is beneath you.<br> When you're willing to do anything you ask your team to do when your help is needed, even cleaning the bathroom, that speaks to your character in a positive way. Instead of thinking less of you, others will actually think more of you. They will feel as though you are a part of the team, plus you'll be able to empathize with their struggles and needs more because you're able to see things from their perspective.<br> </li> <li>Do big things.<br> Taking risks and doing big things in your own career will inspire those around you. Make sure that you are challenging yourself as well as challenging your team.<br> </li> <li>Listen.<br> Listening isn't passive, it's <em>active. </em>Nothing makes someone feel valued more than having a say and being truly listened to. Be curious. Care. Ask questions. Of course, if you want someone to be honest and authentic, you'll need to create a culture of vulnerability by suspending your own judgment and embracing empathy.</li>
</ol>
<p>It can be challenging to find the right things to say sometimes, but take comfort in knowing that your actions can contribute a great deal to effective leadership.</p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a Music Educator and <a contents="Leadership Life Coach" data-link-label="Leadership Life Coach" data-link-type="page" href="/leadership-life-coach" target="_blank">Leadership Life Coach</a> who specializes in helping creatives build cultures of joy and empowerment.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69976562022-06-20T08:36:51-06:002022-06-20T08:36:51-06:00Procrastinating Your Way to Productivity<p>I like getting things done. I love the feeling of accomplishment and crossing things off my to-do list. As a child, no one needed to remind me to practice or do my homework. Granted, I was an OVER-achiever with some issues, but even now, as an adult who's addressed those overwork mindsets and habits in order to overcome <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelm</a> and burnout, I just <em>like</em> to work.<br><br>So when I feel a pull to procrastinate, I know there's something that needs my attention. <u> Allowing myself to procrastinate the thing I <em>think</em> I should be doing is often the answer to being more productive.</u> The way I feel when I want to put things off is the flag that tells me something else is more important. I know that my personality type and character don't value laziness, so when I want to be lazy, it's time to dig deeper.<br><br>Here are the questions to ask when you feel like procrastinating:<br><br><u><span class="font_large">Do you physically need anything?</span></u><br>Being hungry, tired, or immobile are things that will cause your body to complain. You may need to eat more (or healthier), sleep more, or move more in order to focus on your to-do list.</p>
<p><u><span class="font_large">Are you socializing enough?</span></u><br>Humans are social creatures. If you're social calendar has been empty, your motivation may be lower because of it. Time to put yourself out there.<br><br><u><span class="font_large">Have you been working too much?</span></u><br>Your brain needs a certain amount of time to process information or it gets <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a>. Create more time for hobbies or just doing nothing to give your brain the rest it needs. Learn how to <a contents="say no" data-link-label="50" data-link-type="page" href="/50" target="_blank">say no</a>.<br><br><u><span class="font_large">Are you disconnected from your purpose?</span></u><br>Forgetting why something is important to do may be at the root of procrastination. Connect your to-do list to your purpose and your long-term goals to motivate and inspire yourself. <a contents="Stop comparing yourself to others." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Stop comparing yourself to others</a> who have their own individual purpose and goals.<br><br>Discipline has its limits in a post-pandemic world. Things that used to be easier may now seem more challenging because the world has changed, and <em>you </em>have changed along with it. Be kind to yourself as you figure out how this new reality works.</p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership life coach who specializes in helping creatives lead with joy and empowerment.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69924042022-06-12T15:38:16-06:002022-06-12T15:38:16-06:00Redefining Resilience<p>When I ran track in school, the team was divided into distance runners and sprinters. A <a contents="study" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/humans-may-have-to-defy-their-natural-biology-to-run-faster-heres-why" target="_blank">study</a> recently came out suggesting that we have a default individual speed, and it's at the point at which we "burn the most energy without burning excess calories." That would mean that pushing ourselves past a certain speed is counter-intuitive to our bodies' welfare.<br><br>This lesson, if true, may transfer well to the general human condition of the past few pandemic years. You should only go as fast as is productive to your bodies' longterm abilities. Pushing yourself past that point is counter-intuitive, and yet, we continue to judge ourselves according to pre-pandemic measures of productivity.<br><br>Resilience is measured differently for each person. Pulling yourself out of the pandemic energy void is going to take longer for some than others.<br><br>For those in charge of teams, you may have noticed this difference already. One person is not weaker than another because they have are on a different resilience track. Ask people what they need and address these needs on an individual basis when possible. My experience in my teaching studio has been that the students who seemed more effected by the pandemic in the beginning took longer to recover, but they produced consistently afterwards. The students who tried to keep the same pace eventually seemed to burn out and were unproductive for an extended period of time.<br><br>Run your own race at your own speed.</p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership life coach who specializes in helping creatives build cultures of joy and empowerment through self-awareness and increased confidence. Get her free guide "<a contents='3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome."' data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"</a> and receive weekly emails of inspiration and leadership tips.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69890192022-06-07T17:48:43-06:002022-06-07T17:48:43-06:00Strategies to Encourage Inspiration and Creativity<p>Writing my dissertation was a constant push and pull of energy, inspiration, anxiety, and <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelm</a>. "A certain amount of anxiety is natural and to be expected," said one of my dissertation guide books. The sheer amount of work to be done was the culprit, and there was a timeline to consider. The pressure was on to just get it done (one of my professors had told me that the best dissertation is a finished dissertation). Sometimes my determination and discipline failed me, so I discovered ways to reignite my excitement to gain momentum.<br><br>So when one of my colleagues told me about a creative slump he had earlier this year, I was reminded of the <u><span class="font_large">strategies I used to jump-start inspiration during my dissertation.</span></u></p>
<ul> <li><strong>Talk about it.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p>Discussing the topic with someone new is a great way to bring back your spark. Being present while their curiosity builds and answering questions often kindles your own curiosity again, and being curious is one of the best ways to innovate solutions.</p>
<ul> <li><strong>Do something new.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p>Totally changing gears and giving your brain something completely different to do can help change perspective and allow you to see your project with new eyes. If this is a team project, doing something new together can multiply the benefits. This is why company retreats can be so effective.</p>
<ul> <li><strong>Spend quality time with loved ones.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p>These are the people who love you know matter what happens with this or any other work project. Being fully engaged with those who have known you for a long time and who love you unconditionally will also help to put things into perspective. Impending deadlines won't seem like such a big deal when you know you have a safety net. Lowering that internal pressure can instantly reduce anxiety and get creativity flowing again.</p>
<p><br>Remember how difficult the past few years have been and understand that your mind and body may still be recovering and trying to cope with the present reality. In short, cut yourself some slack. Inspiration, innovation, and creativity that may have flowed freely before may need a little prompting. Those aspects of your character haven't disappeared completely; it just may take a little more time and prompting to access them.</p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach who helps creatives build cultures of joy and empowerment. Sign up for weekly messages of inspiration and leadership tips sent directly to your inbox and receive the free list "<a contents="50 Ways to Say No" data-link-label="50" data-link-type="page" href="/50" target="_blank">50 Ways to Say No</a>." </em><br><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69825302022-05-29T15:29:40-06:002022-05-29T15:29:40-06:00Getting Back to Busy - How to Manage Post-Pandemic Overwhelm<p>For my creative colleagues, the ease in restrictions is glorious, but now calendars are filling up. I imagine it's not just the arts industry that's experiencing a sudden boom. <br><br>Add to that the family and friends who are making summer plans to see you and the exhilaration of the season making you want to say yes to everyone and everything, and you may be finding yourself pretty exhausted.<br><br>You're brain just isn't used to that much stimulus anymore. It's like a small-town girl's first day in the city. Even if you're an extrovert, it all can be a bit much. It's easy to crash and burn when you're moving faster than you have in years.<br><br><strong><span class="font_large">Here's how to stave off <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelm</a> and burnout:</span></strong></p>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Remember to <a contents="say no" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/f7bcfc7adb" target="_blank">say no</a>.</strong><br> You can't do everything. Pay attention to which events are giving you energy and which ones are taking it. If you have trouble<a contents=" saying no" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/f7bcfc7adb" target="_blank"> saying no</a>, don't say yes in the moment. Allow yourself to get back to people after you've given yourself some time to realize what you really want to do and what your energy limits are.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Prioritize self care.</strong><br> You'd think we'd have all learned this by now, but this new-found freedom is making it easy to fall back into old habits. You can't be at your best if you're not taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental needs. <br> </li> <li>
<strong>Keep your goals achievable.</strong><br> You may feel superhuman because of the increased endorphins and dopamine of socializing in person.<br> You're not. Allow extra time in your schedule to catch up with loved ones and collaborate in new endeavors. This is a time of hyper-creativity. Take advantage of that and keep your goals manageable.<br> </li>
</ul>
<p>There are still plenty of stressors in the world. Your brain may be compartmentalizing them to enjoy in-person socializing and collaborating that have been missing for so long. That takes work. Plus you're exercising networking and conversational skills that have been dormant. Be kind to yourself.<br> </p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a leadership life coach, musician, and educator who helps creatives build cultures of joy and empowerment. Get weekly emails of inspiration and leadership tips sent directly to your inbox and receive the free list "<a contents="50 Ways to Say No" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/f7bcfc7adb" target="_blank">50 Ways to Say No</a>."</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69771572022-05-22T11:44:07-06:002022-05-22T11:44:07-06:00How the Arts Take DEI to the Next Level<p>This past weekend, I attended a statewide arts conference. Like most creatives, I spent the majority of the past two years in professional isolation, trying to make the best of the situation but ultimately falling short because the arts are collaborative. We collaborate with each other, we make music <em>with each other</em>, and we share that creative energy with the audience during performances.<br><br>Needless to say, being a part of the conference was cathartic and meaningful for many, including myself. That feeling of belonging that the arts create has been missing for the artists themselves, the very people who build that culture for others. We are finding our community again, after being torn apart. Many of our colleagues are not here, having left the industry to embrace a more secure means of financial support. No one blames them. There is no shame in providing for yourself and your family, but they are missed. Those of us remaining are the ones who <em>have to </em>create to breathe, to feel like ourselves, and for our souls to thrive.<br><br>We ache with loss as we tentatively embrace inspiration and rise to the call to create again in community. For me, music has become like a bad boyfriend. Do I trust it now, after being betrayed so often with cancellation after cancellation? My heart is broken. Our hearts are broken. We are healing; we are mending, together.<br><br>The arts have always led the way in areas of diversity, equity, and inclusion, but I was struck by how much that diversity was celebrated at the conference. Diversity was lifted up through the poems written and read by those will disabilities, in the performances of minority groups, and in the topics, discussions, and interests of those presenting and attending. We're acknowledging that we can do better, and celebrating the process of growth.</p>
<p>I met the Dean of Fine Arts of a university who has led the way in diversity in higher education employment in the state, a local autistic artist whose self-esteem soared when the Library of Congress featured one of his works, and a Chautauqua performance artist who's part of a group relaying the stories of women pioneers of varying ethnicities. No one was aloof or pompous or righteous. No one was a stranger.<br><br>As arts communities around the world rise up as the pandemic wanes, expect to see more connection, imagination, and celebration of our humanity. The arts can help to drag us out of the darkness, fear, and tribalism of the past few years if we let them. They can help us heal and remind us how to trust again, just as they did for me in a weekend.</p>
<p>The arts aren't elitist, or at least they shouldn't be. They're there for all of us, a celebration of the complexities and harmonies within our humanity.<br> </p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a musician, educator, author, composer/arranger, and leadership coach whose mission is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world. Join her mailing list to receive weekly emails of inspiration and leadership tips and receive the free worksheet <a contents="5 Steps to Overcome Overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">5 Steps to Overcome Overwhelm</a>.</em><br><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69638932022-05-09T19:00:00-06:002022-05-25T06:16:51-06:00When Tension Gets Out of Control - 3 Ways to DeStress<p>When personalities collide or the latest disaster hits the news-cycle, <br>the physical tension can be almost unbearable. <br><br>All the self care in the world can't seem to stop the emotional response of some trauma. It doesn't mean you're not taking care of yourself. It doesn't mean you're crazy. These times are intense.</p>
<h3>Here are my favorite go-to ways to ground myself and manage the tension:</h3>
<ol> <li>Breathe.<br> Slow, deep breaths calm the Vagus nerve and stop the fight-or-flight symptoms of your parasympathetic nervous system. If you already practice meditation, this type of breathing can instantly connect you to your meditation ritual and instantly calm you.<br> </li> <li>Move.<br> Meditative movement to running to boxing, movement will help you to connect with your body and get your energy flowing in a positive way instead of stagnating in stress hormones. I find movement that requires a lot of mental concentration, like Qiqong or TaiChi to be best for me. Experiment and figure out what gives you the most relief.<br> </li> <li>Socialize (or don't).<br> Depending on your personality type, just being around others can be a panacea, especially if the stress is being caused by a social or political event. The adage "misery loves company" has some truth here. It's comforting to know that you are not alone in your reactions or emotional state. If you prefer to be alone, do so with intention. Sit with your emotions in order to acknowledge and identify them.<br> </li>
</ol>
<p>Adapting to stressful situations doesn't just happen. Get to know yourself, body and mind, and what you need to decompress. Listen to the messages your body is sending you through physical tension and emotional stress and do something about it. Ignoring these will usually only cause them to manifest in more unpleasant and potentially damaging ways.<br> </p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a musician and leadership life coach who helps creatives build cultures of joy and empowerment. Get weekly messages of inspiration, leadership tips, and a link to her latest blog by signing up <a contents="here" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">here</a> and receiving the free worksheet, <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."' data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."</a></em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69621552022-05-02T19:10:41-06:002022-05-02T19:10:41-06:00Accepting Feedback - 4 Ways to Make the Most Out of Criticism<p>We've all been there...our egos get bruised from feedback (solicited or unsolicited) and we feel the need to either defend ourselves or hide away and lick our wounds. In fact,<a contents=" a recent study by Tasha Eurich" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.speakersoffice.com/the-right-way-to-respond-to-negative-feedback/" target="_blank"> a recent study by Tasha Eurich</a> showed that even those of use who are great at learning from feedback still feel the same emotional pain initially. </p>
<p>That emotional pain lights up the same areas of the brain as physical pain, according to <a contents="neurological studies" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/body-sense/201204/emotional-and-physical-pain-activate-similar-brain-regions" target="_blank">neurological studies</a>, so of course we don't like the immediate, and apparently universally human, reaction to feedback. It hurts.<br><br>The importance of feedback, however, is critical to our self-awareness (another point made by Tasha Eurich), which in turn is important to our success as leaders, entrepreneurs, educators, and almost every other occupation. Feedback makes us better by exposing our blind spots and allowing us to see ourselves accurately, without the clouding of our own misperceptions or egos. Eurich's research is clear...feedback is good for us.<br><br><span class="font_large"><em>Bridging that gap between our initial, painful reaction to feedback and learning to seek it out in order to better ourselves can be challenging. </em></span></p>
<h3>
<br><span class="font_regular"><u><strong>Here are my suggestions on how to get the most out of feedback:</strong></u></span>
</h3>
<ul> <li> <p><strong><span class="font_regular">Say thank you </span></strong><span class="font_regular">first, even when you're not feeling it. Feedback often comes from a helpful place. Unfortunately, not everyone is great at giving feedback, so it can come off as unnecessarily hurtful. Give everyone the benefit of the doubt, even if you're suspicious of their intentions, to be gracious. Show them that you're grateful for their attempt to help you, even if hurts right now.</span></p> </li> <li> <p><strong><span class="font_regular">Keep from defending yourself. </span></strong><span class="font_regular">There are two sides to every story. Feedback is about listening to someone else's interpretation. You already know your side of the story. You don't have to prove anything to anyone. Stop to urge to correct them or explain yourself. Just listen.</span></p> </li> <li>
<strong>Sit with it. </strong> Wait until the emotion passes to consider the feedback objectively. Was the feedback accurate? Is it useful? Consider the source. Does this person usually have insightful perceptions? Is this person someone whose opinion you respect? Are you getting the same type of feedback from multiple sources? Do you need more information? <br> </li> <li>
<strong>Decide how to act on it.</strong> Again, you want to be thinking rationally for this step. Ask yourself how you can make the most out of the feedback. If you've deemed it not credible or helpful (without your ego involved), you can ignore it. If there's any truth to it, you can choose improve yourself through changing your actions, habits, and/or mindset.<br> </li>
</ul>
<p>Carefully considering feedback and it's source and consciously deciding how to act upon it can be easier said than done. This may take practice and time. Take comfort that you are on the path to more self-awareness and more success.</p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and leadership/life coach who specializes in helping creatives lead with joy and empowerment. <a contents="Subscribe" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Subscribe</a> to her weekly emails of inspiration and leadership tips and receive the free guide <a contents='"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"' data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"</a> and the links to new blogposts.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69564322022-04-25T11:40:15-06:002022-09-03T08:06:02-06:00Why a Predictable Character Matters – 3 Reasons for Consistency in Leadership<p>In a pedagogy class, the professor told us it was good to keep students off balance, that it was a positive if they didn't know where they stood with you. This was the opposite of what I found to be true in my leadership experience. If people know where they stand with you, they're not wasting energy trying to prove themselves. They don't to manage the anxiety caused by working for someone who is a "loose cannon," someone who's actions and reactions are unpredictable.<br><br>While my professor may have thought this kept people alert in class and motivated them to achieve more, his philosophy has some serious downfalls. Having a predictable character, which includes being true to your word and following through on promised actions, increases the productivity and creativity of your best students (and employees). Being unpredictable causes unnecessary pressure and anxiety, especially for those who are internally motivated.<br><br><span class="font_large">Here's 3 reasons why a predictable character matters:</span><br> </p>
<ul> <li>
<strong>When people know where they stand with you, a more positive and relaxed culture is created.</strong><br> No one needs any extra stress, and being insecure about your professional relationship with superiors is stressful. <a contents="Research" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://sloanreview.mit.edu/article/toxic-culture-is-driving-the-great-resignation/" target="_blank">Research</a> shows that toxic cultures contributed significantly to workplace resignation during the pandemic. A sense of security and safety in the workplace promotes a more positive culture. Having a loose cannon for a boss does not.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Consistent expectations facilitate communication.</strong><br> You can't expect people to meet fluid goals. Furthermore, you can verbally communicate your expectations, but unless leadership actions are consistent and the level of expectation remains stable, verbal communication will fall short. Actions speak louder than words. Only when expectations are clearly and consistently stated through both words and actions do people know what is genuinely expected of them. And only then can they meet these expectations appropriately.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Productivity and quality will most likely increase.</strong><br> Positive leadership tends to bring out the best in people, including their ability to produce efficiently and effectively. Having an unpredictable character translates into unpredictable leadership. Intentional vagueness or unpredictability used to increase productivity is based on the premise that people need external pressure to succeed and produce at the highest level, yet, the best employees are internally motivated. </li>
</ul>
<p>Most of that class had a stomachache for the final. With vague expectations and unpredictable leadership comes an immense amount of unnecessary stress. Being consistent with your words, actions, and expectations encourages potential to flourish without the drama. <br><br> </p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a musician and leadership & life coach who helps creative leaders build cultures of joy and empowerment. Sign up for a link to each week's blogpost and an inspirational message sent directly to your inbox and receive the free worksheet "<a contents="5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm</a>."</em><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69460712022-04-11T16:07:47-06:002023-12-10T09:32:40-07:00Self-Care: Four Ways in Which Mindset Matters<p>Being an overachiever was my M.O. in my early adult years. Graves disease and back problems forced me to prioritize self-care in my thirties, but it wasn't easy. I was devastated that I wasn't able to work full-time and do everything I wanted to do. I had mindsets I had to change in order to embrace a life that didn't require me to always be achieving to matter.<br><br><span class="font_large">Here are the four main mindset changes I had to make:</span></p>
<ul> <li><strong>You are more than your job.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p>However you define your job (by your ability to make money, lead a household, or be a good parent) does not define your worth as a person. You are good enough just as you are. You don't have anything to prove to anyone, including yourself!</p>
<ul> <li><strong>You can’t help others if you can’t help yourself. </strong></li>
</ul>
<p>That speech on airplanes about putting on your own oxygen mask first applies to more than just airplanes. "You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep others warm," is one of my favorite anonymous quotations because it's so true. You can't give more of yourself than you have to begin with. Filling up your own cup isn't selfish; it means you have more to give to others.</p>
<ul> <li><strong>You may actually be enabling when you think that you're helping.</strong></li>
</ul>
<p>I used to take care of my students at every opportunity. I would print out application forms and remind them of deadlines, for example, as well as bring extra music and a repair kit to auditions for them. When I began teaching remotely while I was in grad school, they had to take care of a lot of these things themselves. Guess what? They were better for it. They were more knowledgeable and confident at finding their own opportunities and being prepared on their own. I thought I'd been helping, but I had really been denying them the opportunity of empowerment. I still guide my student and offer advice, but I don't enable them anymore. </p>
<ul> <li><strong>Your body and life are a gift. </strong></li>
</ul>
<p>This seems like an obvious one, but how often do you push yourself past the limit? Do you stay up too late, not get enough sleep, eat disgusting food, and constantly put aside any physical activity. Appreciate your body and your life by taking care of yourself. </p>
<p>How would you feel if someone didn’t value a gift you gave them? Show the Universe that you’re grateful for the gift of your life by honoring your mind, body, and spirit.</p>
<ul> <li><strong>Being busy is not a burden. </strong></li>
</ul>
<p>Culture places priority on working hard instead of smart, buy burnout is not a badge of courage. We say “I’m busy” like we’re really saying “I’m stressed out.” You can be busy and not be overwhelmed. Be happy that you have things to do that you love. <br> </p>
<p>When I wasn’t able to do everything I wanted to (OR everything I thought I should be doing), I felt like I had to prove my worth as a human. I was enough doing what I could do. You are enough.</p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a music educator and <a contents="leadership &amp; life coach" data-link-label="Leadership & Life Coach" data-link-type="page" href="/leadership-life-coach" target="_blank">leadership & life coach</a>. Her mission in both jobs is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world. She specializes in helping clients and students overcome <a contents="imposter syndrome" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">imposter syndrome</a> and <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelm</a> in order to lead with joy and empowerment.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69327692022-03-28T07:00:00-06:002022-03-28T13:51:17-06:00Five Life Lessons I've Learned Through Managing Chronic Pain <p>I've been managing chronic pain for over twelve years. Although I've found strategies and a health support team to increase my mobility and decrease the pain over this time, I'd given up on finding any answers as to why.<br><br>I recently found a physical therapist who was able to put the pieces together in a way in which all of my symptoms made sense. I was hit by a car when I was a young child and had emergency surgery for a lacerated liver, after which my neuromuscular system recovered in some not-so-healthy ways.<br><br>Who knew?!<br><br>It's easy to ask the usual questions: Why me? What could I have done differently? and Who is to blame? but I've found that line of thinking to be unproductive.<br><br><span class="font_large">Below are five life-lessons I've learned through managing chronic pain:</span></p>
<ul> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><strong>Focus on the present.</strong><br> Use your energy to practice mindfulness, not get distracted by the past and what-ifs. You can't change the past. You can also default to panic about every flare-up, thinking that it will last forever. That just causes more stress and tension. Again, focus on the right now.</span><br> </li> <li>
<strong>You are enough.</strong><br> You are more than your job. You are more than a mother, husband, or any other title with which you identify. Just being you is enough. Stop doing all the things you think you should be doing that don't actually need to be done, and don't feel guilty about it. You have worth and value outside of what you do.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>No one knows your needs unless you communicate them.</strong><br> People don't understand your struggles or challenges intuitively. Communicating what you need is a strength, not a weakness. If people judge it as a weakness, that's their issue, not yours. In general, people aren't thinking about you. They have their own needs on which they're focusing, not yours. <br> </li> <li>
<strong>What other people think of you really doesn't matter.</strong><br> What you think of yourself matters the most. Even the people who live with you don't fully understand what it takes to overcome your challenges on a daily basis. Stop needing others' approval and give yourself the understanding, empathy, and compassion you desire. The more you respect yourself, the more you're able to create the life you want, no matter the circumstances.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Things change.</strong><br> The only true constant is change. When my pain was at its worst, and it felt like I couldn't go on anymore, I tried to remember that. Everything is temporary, even the journey of life itself. If you aren't able to rise up and be your best self in this moment, waiting is your next best solution. Being in what seems like a holding pattern may just be the universe preparing your next adventure. Hang in there.<br> <br> It's pretty weird to think of having chronic pain as a gift, and I'm not always in that head space every moment of every day, but there is truth in it. How can I not be grateful for these lessons that have changed my life in countless positive ways? Plus, I'm actually lucky to be alive, since a lacerated liver is often the endgame.<br> <br> These and other gifts are what I focus on when the healing process temporarily causes more pain. Change is uncomfortable, whether or not it's physical, emotional, mental, or cultural change, but that's the price we pay for the beauty of our humanity as risk-takers and life-lovers.</li>
</ul>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a music educator and leadership & life coach whose purpose is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world. Download the free guide "<a contents='3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"' data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome"</a> or free worksheet <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm' data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm</a>" and get weekly emails of inspiration and leadership sent directly to your email inbox.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69289422022-03-22T10:19:59-06:002022-03-22T10:19:59-06:00Recovering from the Great Resignation - What Your Team Needs<p>I'm constantly having conversations with professionals as an aspect of my coaching business, and what I'm hearing over and over again from people in their fifties, sixties, and even forties is that they are just wanting to retire. Some are burnt out, others are grappling with the disillusionment of their career choices (such as my colleagues in the music industry), and some have felt devalued for so long that they're just done.<br><br>A <a contents="recent study" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://sloanreview.mit.edu/article/toxic-culture-is-driving-the-great-resignation/" target="_blank">recent study</a> by Ben Zweig and Donald and Charles Sull revealed the main reasons for the Great Resignation. Culture has been a key component to so many people leaving the workforce, and it's fair to blame toxic culture for the types of feedback I'm receiving in these conversations. Going forward, how do we as leaders create a culture that allows our teams (and ourselves) to recover from the pandemic and the myriad of environmental and political stressors of the past few years?</p>
<ul> <li>
<u><span class="font_large">More time off</span></u><br> <a contents="A 2014 study" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/americans-overwhelmingly-value-money-over-time-253359751.html" target="_blank">A 2014 study</a> showed that 79% of Americans would choose a pay increase over more vacation time, and a <a contents="record number" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.ustravel.org/press/study-record-768-million-us-vacation-days-went-unused-18-opportunity-cost-billions" target="_blank">record number</a> of vacation days were left on the table in 2018. With burnout now at epidemic levels, that's no longer the case. Jenny Gross, in a <a contents="2021 New York Times article" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/08/14/business/dealbook/vacation-burnout.html" target="_blank">2021 New York Times article</a>, concluded that more vacation won't solve burnout from the viewpoint of stopping burnout in the workplace, but she doesn't address <em>recovering</em> from burnout. For that, people are going to need more time away from work. More than that, establishing a culture in which employees are expected to use all their vacation time and are not contacted or expected to check in while on vacation will allow for them to take vacation without worrying about lost promotions or interrupting their healing.<br> </li> <li>
<u><span class="font_large">A safe environment</span></u><br> This may seem obvious, but some companies actually forced their employees back to work in person and then dropped mask policies. The politicization of the pandemic lead to unsafe work environments for those at risk and for those who had loved ones at risk.<br> </li> <li>
<u><span class="font_large">Flexibility and child care</span></u><br> Women in the workforce have been set back an entire generation due to pandemic-related job losses, according to the <a contents="National Women's Law Center" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://nwlc.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/December-Jobs-Day.pdf" target="_blank">National Women's Law Center</a>. Flexible schedules and company-sponsored child care are ways to encourage their return.<br> </li> <li>
<u><span class="font_large">DE&I </span></u><br> Minorities are tired of feeling devalued and unappreciated in addition to being tired in general. More than ever, employees need to be connected to purpose and common goals, but that won't happen without inclusion. From my personal point of view, I've severed connections with several organizations that are clueless about DE&I because I could no longer stay quiet about gender-promoted injustice. People need to feel valued and appreciated to be able to heal a poor relationship with their employers.<br> </li> <li>
<u><span class="font_large">Aware leadership</span></u><br> The most confident leaders aren't necessarily the best; they may just be suffering from <a contents="Dunning-Kruger effect." data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/dunning-kruger-effect" target="_blank">Dunning-Kruger effect.</a> If not,<a contents=" Tasha Eurich" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://tashaeurich.com/" target="_blank"> Tasha Eurich</a>'s research has shown a big disconnect between how self-aware leaders think they (95%) are versus how self-aware they actually are (only 10-15%). The take-away? Don't be fooled by confidence; it may be misplaced. Look more carefully at candidates who are more thoughtful than boastful and more soft-spoken than gregarious. Empathy is what your best employees want most out of leadership, not confidence.</li>
</ul>
<p>There are no quick fixes when it comes to toxic cultures or regaining the trust of employees who've been treated poorly. There are no quick fixes to burnout. The Great Resignation is forcing companies with high attrition rates to make changes, but it may not be enough for those anywhere near retirement. Leadership is going to have to be compassionate and empathetic, as well as making an effort to re-engage certain members of their team through inclusion and appreciation.</p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a music educator and <a contents="leadership &amp; life coach" data-link-label="Leadership & Life Coach" data-link-type="page" href="/leadership-life-coach" target="_blank">leadership & life coach</a>. She specializes in helping overachievers create cultures of joy and empowerment through self-leadership. Sign up for weekly emails of inspiration, leadership tips, and links to new blogposts and receive the free worksheet <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."' data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69218772022-03-14T11:26:24-06:002022-03-14T11:26:24-06:00Ubuntu and Inspirational Leadership<p>I use the African word ubuntu to help my clients who have trouble asking for help <br>to realize that they've already received an endless amount of support already<br>and that their journey to success is not theirs alone, but a community effort,<br>whether or not they embrace it.<br><br>The concept is much more complicated than that<br>and to simplify it as part of a leadership model<br>could be interpreted as <a contents="cultural misappropriation" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://theculturetrip.com/africa/south-africa/articles/understanding-the-meaning-of-ubuntu-a-proudly-south-african-philosophy/" target="_blank">cultural misappropriation</a>.<br><br>To disregard it's importance in leadership altogether<br>would be a great loss, however,<br>for the tenets of ubuntu<br>are inspirational.<br><br>Ubuntu philosophy can loosely be translated as <br><a contents='"I am because of who we all are"' data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://ro.uow.edu.au/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=4272&context=sspapers&httpsredir=1&referer#:~:text=Ubuntu%20can%20best%20be%20described,ngumuntu%20ngabantu%20in%20Zulu%20language." target="_blank">"I am because of who we all are"</a><br>and can be helpful to motivate people to focus on a common goal<br>instead of their own interests.</p>
<p>More than that,<br>it highlights a feeling of belonging<br>only truly attained through inclusion.</p>
<p>Dissecting the tenets of ubuntu<br>and relating them to traditional leadership structures<br>may not be the best use of this complicated term,<br>but promoting the qualities emulated in the philosophy<br>overlaps with what the best employee's want out of leadership.</p>
<p>Of the <a contents="10 qualities identified by Martin Prozesky" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://iep.utm.edu/hunhu/#H5" target="_blank">10 qualities identified by Martin Prozesky</a> below, empathy, humaneness, <br>vulnerability, and compassion directly correlate to modern leadership ideals.</p>
<p>Humaneness <br>Gentleness <br>Hospitality <br>Empathy or taking trouble for others <br>Deep Kindness <br>Friendliness <br>Generosity <br>Vulnerability <br>Toughness <br>Compassion</p>
<p>Inspirational leadership is not new. Before the Western world knew of ubuntu and before leadership models were established, these inspirational qualities existed in the hearts and minds of influential leaders. Let that inspiration be your guide during the most challenging times. <br> </p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a music educator and <a contents="leadership &amp; life coach" data-link-label="Leadership & Life Coach" data-link-type="page" href="/leadership-life-coach" target="_blank">leadership & life coach</a>. Her mission is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world. Sign up for her weekly inspirational emails <a contents="here" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">here</a> and receive the free guide "<a contents="5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm." data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm.</a>"</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69159062022-03-07T09:51:36-07:002022-03-07T09:52:23-07:00Four Ways to Help a Stressed-Out Team Focus<p>Friends and clients are confiding in me that it's incredibly challenging to focus right now. That should be no surprise to leaders everywhere as we've maneuvered two years of "unprecedented" times with the pandemic and its workplace, political, and societal upheavals only to have a war in Ukraine, inflation, and supply chain problems unfold.<br><br>I know, I didn't want to be reminded of all that either, but our brains are always trying to figure these things out it in the background in order to keep us safe. That leaves less processing time available for the tasks at hand, which brings me back to focus.<br><br><span class="font_large">How can you help your team get the most out of the minimalized energy available to them?</span><br> </p>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Keep instructions simple, in order, and communicate them in multiple ways.</strong><br> Just telling someone to do something isn't enough. Follow-up with a bullet-point email and make sure every instruction is as simple and precise as possible. Checking up on comprehension and progress and sending out deadline reminders isn't micromanaging (it's actually a good thing) unless you take it too far and undermine their autonomy.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Break long-term goals into shorter ones.</strong><br> Vision is great, but long-term planning may be too much for some people right now. Leaders can break these goals into shorter ones, and focus on one at a time, having team members place that goal in a prominent place that they see regularly. This connects them to purpose and helps them focus on one step at a time, while managing feelings of <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelm</a>.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Express empathy.</strong><br> In the dozens of phone calls I've had with high-achieving employees, the one leadership characteristic that they express is the most needed is almost always empathy. During stressful times, that's what's going to keep your best team members and lower attrition rates in general. When people feel understood and supported, stress can be lowered dramatically, which in turn will increase the ability to focus.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Be consistent.</strong><br> People like knowing where they stand in situations and in relationship to others. Now is not the time for unnecessary change. Try to be as consistent in your words and actions as possible. Yes, we all need to be resilient and adapt to change, but high stress situations make that more difficult. Don't have the same expectations of your team (or yourself) to manage change as you did pre-pandemic.<br> </li>
</ul>
<p>No one expects leaders to be superheroes right now. Your team will understand if you are struggling with the same human things they are. Just show up and be the best human you can right now.</p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a leadership coach and semi-retired music educator, having taught hundreds of elite students, managed an internationally-recognized community ensemble, and performed with the San Diego Ballet, The Temptations, and The Four Tops. She helps overwhelmed overachievers lead with joy and empowerment.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/69072022022-02-28T09:35:00-07:002022-02-28T09:40:01-07:00Four Things to Say to Potential Collaborators<p>A music colleague recently asked me what to say to collaborators so that they don't feel pressured to agree with her or join her project. This resonated with me because I'm the type of person who gets things done and makes things happen, so I have to be careful that I don't push others into doing things they aren't really passionate about. </p>
<p>Here are the things I say to potential collaborators to </p>
<ul> <li>make sure they are a good fit</li> <li>protect myself from doing the majority of the work</li> <li>build a trusting environment</li>
</ul>
<p> </p>
<h3><u>"Is this something you're interested in?"</u></h3>
<p>This question opens the door for dialogue and helps to give you a sense as to their level of passion for the project. Finding out their motivation is important. Do you want someone who's interested in collaborating mainly for the money or do you want someone who will match your enthusiasm because of a more altruistic mission? Dig deeper with follow-up questions such as "what interests you exactly?" or "what's the main reason you're interested?" You can also ask them what their concerns are specifically.</p>
<h3><u>"You can say no."</u></h3>
<p>Simply giving someone permission to say no can take the pressure off. You want to collaborate with someone who wants to be there, not someone who is agreeing to do something because they have trouble setting boundaries. Especially if you already have a personal relationship with this person, they may feel like they're letting you down. Remind them that they are saying no to the project, not the person.</p>
<h3><u>"Take time to think about it."</u></h3>
<p>When your idea is unusual or unique, it may take people off guard. Realize that, even though this may be something they eventually really want to do, it may take some time for them to get in touch with that or they may need to make sure they have the resources to fully participate.</p>
<h3><u>"If it's not a 'heck yeah,' it's a 'no.'"</u></h3>
<p>This is how I measure potential collaborations for myself. Sharing this with others sends them the message that if they don't share your passion, they aren't the right fit for right now. You can keep the door open for future collaborations by letting them know that they can contact you if their situation changes. Be genuine and authentic here. You don't want someone to begrudgingly collaborate with you. You want someone to be all in, to be part of a team that you can share wins and struggles with, and to be willing to put in the same amount of time, energy, and passion that you will.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>We all should be doing the things that light our souls up, not feeling pressured to do things that don't align with our values or that aren't a good fit for where we are in our lives. That's where the magic lives. Those are the collaborations that draw in other people and lead to other projects that bring us joy. Don't sell yourself or your potential collaborators short with anything less.</p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a music educator and leadership & life coach whose mission is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world. Join her email list to get messages of inspiration and leadership sent to your inbox weekly and get the free gift <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."' data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."</a></em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68800702022-02-22T07:55:00-07:002022-02-22T08:00:06-07:00Stressed By Trying To Eat Healthy - Three Easy But Powerful Tips<p>Do you feel stressed or overwhelmed trying to eat healthy? Does even seeing those two words “eating healthy” cause your stress levels to increase or send you into panic mode? </p>
<p>As a board certified health and wellness coach, I’m often asked how to make healthy eating easier. And less stressful. </p>
<p>Eating healthy doesn’t have to be complicated. You simply need to focus on eating whole foods the way God created them. Things like veggies and fruits in all their varied colors. In fact, the key is to eat a varied diet – that’s one reason there are so many colors. We reap so many nutritional benefits when we include a variety – not eating the same thing day after day. That gets boring. But the boredom is actually productive because that prompts us to change up what we’re eating, not only for the fun but also for the nutrient diversity when we do. </p>
<p>Now sometimes some people may need to limit or eliminate certain foods for a while. And others may need to eliminate for longer periods of time due to various medical conditions, allergies, or sensitivities like celiac disease, peanut or shellfish allergy, or IBS issues. Or even if you have other symptoms because doing that can often help your body decrease the inflammation. </p>
<p><strong>What symptoms? Things like — </strong></p>
<p>*Brain Fog </p>
<p>*Fatigue </p>
<p>*Headaches </p>
<p>*Stomach Pain </p>
<p>*Trouble losing weight and/or keeping it off </p>
<p><strong>Why are we having those symptoms? </strong></p>
<p>Because these symptoms are like warning lights in your car. They’re telling you something isn’t quite right, and you need to do something to help. </p>
<p>But too often we don’t listen. Right? </p>
<p>We often ignore these symptoms. And so what happens to your body? You run out of gas just like your car would if you ignored the gas gauge warning light. You continue to have the symptoms (or those warning lights) and don’t do anything that really helps. Having these symptoms may be common, but they’re not normal. There is a difference. </p>
<p>Many of my clients have had the same thing happen to them. And I did as well. That’s why I’m so adamant about helping you gain the knowledge and figure out what’s going on. Because I’ve been there. </p>
<p>We often just keep on doing the same things, right? We keep on eating the same foods we’ve been eating, continue our fast-paced and busy life without making time for fun and self-care, keep on not making time for exercising or movement, keep on burning the midnight oil, and we don’t stop for a check-up. We either don’t see the warning light or we do see it and say, “Hmmm. Wonder what that means.” But we don’t schedule an appointment with our medical practitioner to rule out any chronic illnesses or conditions. Or maybe we do and they tell us everything is normal. But we still don’t feel right. So what can we can do? There are some simple first steps. </p>
<p><strong>Here are 3 questions to ask yourself: </strong></p>
<p>What are you eating? Really – every day – not the occasional treat. What’s your norm? <br>Are you eating out a lot? Not every now and then, but many times a week you’re going through drive-through? <br>How can you eat a variety of foods that are healthy and don’t require hours and hours in the kitchen? </p>
<p><strong>The Answers: </strong></p>
<p>Eat a healthy protein, healthy fat (like avocados, olives, and olive oil), complex carbs (veggies and fruits – not pastas, bread, and cookies), plus fiber daily. This will keep you fuller longer and prevent temptations to eat sugary and processed foods. <br>Write down 1 – 3 meals you can cook this week. Write down the ingredients, buy them, and cook during the week or weekend. <br>What’s one way you can vary your food and make meal prep easier? </p>
<p>Cooking with the Instant Pot (pressure cooker) or slow cooker is one way to help you eat healthier, create variety in your meals, and make easy-to-prepare meals. Just pick out one new recipe this week and try it. Click here for a delicious chicken and sweet potato soup. </p>
<p>Plus, if you need a little extra help for your own health journey, reach out. As a board certified health and wellness coach, I work with clients who need help in setting goals and taking small steps to help decrease fatigue, brain fog, and sugar cravings, lose or maintain weight, and fit into their favorite jeans again! I have openings for my one-one-one programs – 3 and 6 months. I’ve also added one new element to my programs that has been requested for a while. I’m providing a 60 minute one-time strategy session. So reach out to me either by message or you can click here. </p>
<p>—————————————————————————————————————————- </p>
<p>Leah Cheshire, MCD, CCC-SLP, NBC-HWC is a national board certified health and wellness coach and a speech-language pathologist who works primarily with women who have brain fog, fatigue, joint pains, weight issues, autoimmune, hormonal, and digestive issues. She’s also an autoimmune warrior herself and uses nutritional and lifestyle modifications for both herself and clients. Click<a contents=" here" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://nurturingyourlife.com/contact/" target="_blank"> here</a> to contact her for a free discovery call.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68801442022-02-15T07:00:00-07:002022-05-19T05:06:09-06:00How to Manage the Emotions of Overwhelm<p>The physical symptoms of overwhelm are bad enough.<br>You may be not able to sleep through the night and have an increased heart rate or fatigue,<br>to name a few.<br><br>But how are you managing emotionally?<br><br>Are you feeling anxious or irritable?<br>Do you feel resentment growing?<br><br>The pandemic and the Great Resignation are taking a toll on the workforce.<br>You're most likely having to do more with less,<br>as is everyone around you.<br><br><span class="font_large">Here are some ways to manage those emotions until you can make real change:</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><strong>Do nothing.</strong></span><br> This may seem impossible, but even the smallest moment you can take<br> to sit and do nothing will help ground you, which in turn helps level out your emotional state.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Breathe.</strong><br> Slow breathing will bring down your pulse rate and help to manage anxiety.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Exercise.</strong><br> Even a short walk will help your piece of mind and lessen overwhelm. Don't think you have time?<br> You really don't have time NOT to. You'll be more productive if you do.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Get outside.</strong><br> If you can't get out into nature, at least get some fresh air. Humans need this. You need this.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Get some sleep.</strong><br> Getting a full night's sleep helps to regulate hormones, as does eating healthy. Keeping your hormones regulated helps to regulate your emotional state.</li>
</ol>
<p>Interested in learning more? Click <a contents="here." data-link-label="yes" data-link-type="page" href="/yes" target="_blank">here.</a><br><br>The entire first module of my online course <a contents="Overwhelmed to Overjoyed " data-link-label="yes" data-link-type="page" href="/yes" target="_blank">Overwhelmed to Overjoyed </a>is about learning the techniques<br>to help manage your physical and emotional distress immediately, but enrollment closes soon!</p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Leadership & Life Coach" data-link-type="page" href="/leadership-life-coach" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a Music Educator and Leadership & Life Coach who takes her students and clients from feeling overwhelmed to "ready to fly" with her step-by-step, hand-holding method to empowerment and joy.</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68800692022-02-08T07:00:00-07:002022-02-08T07:00:01-07:00How I Kept from Getting Overwhelmed Creating and Launching My First Online Course<p>Ever since I pivoted my 20+ years as a music educator to include leadership coaching into my slash career portfolio,<br>I've been trying to find a way to make it more accessible to people who live paycheck to paycheck <br>or have trouble making those initial investments in themselves.<br><br>Coaching is powerful stuff, and I wanted more people to be able to experience its benefits.<br><br>At some point, I realized that an online course could be a gateway to do all those things.<br><br>What was I most passionate about? <em>Helping overwhelmed overachievers create a work/life balance<br>consisting of peace, harmony, and joy.</em><br><br>As a leadership coach, I'd realized that I wasn't impacting burnout culture as I'd hoped -<br>most of my clients suffered from overwhelm brought on by their superiors,<br>yet they protected their own team from the trickle-down effect.<br><br>My solution was to focus on training those susceptible to overwhelm<br>to be able to set boundaries, change their mindsets, and realize their own worth<br>in order to protect themselves from predatory management and CEOs.<br><br>My course would ultimately be called "<u><a contents="Overwhelmed to Overjoyed" data-link-label="yes" data-link-type="page" href="/yes">Overwhelmed to Overjoyed</a>: A step-by-step roadmap<br>to realizing your value, forging compassionate boundaries, and working smarter</u>." <br><em>I will take people from feeling anxious and overwhelmed to feeling valued and at peace,<br>and they'll be able to experience guilt-free boundaries while increasing efficiency at work and joy in their lives.</em><br><br>That's a tall order for someone who's never created or launched a digital course!<br><br><span class="font_large">Here's what I did to keep myself from getting overwhelmed...</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<u><strong>Get help from the best.</strong></u><br> When you're doing something for the first time, it helps to get mentored or coached from someone with experience in whatever it is you're looking at doing. I enrolled in an online course from an industry leader with over a decade of experience. This investment had paid for itself many times over not only because of the priceless knowledge that comes with experience, but also because of the support and the time and energy I was able to save through the knowledge and support I gained. <br> </li> <li>
<strong><u>Invest in time-saving products.</u></strong><br> Spending money on systems, products, and services that save you time is an investment in yourself. This is worth your money. You don't have to go with the gold standard. For example, the LMS (Learning Management System) I chose was actually a lot less expensive than the competition, but the technology was easier for me to implement and served my needs better than its more expensive counterparts.<br> </li> <li>
<u><strong>Pay for support.</strong></u><br> Live tech support was an important aspect for me, especially when I was deciding on a webinar provider since I'd never done a webinar before, much less a LIVE webinar, which is what my coach highly suggested. Most providers (LMS, webinar, email systems, etc.) offer live chats or support, but you may have to pay extra. The expense is worth the piece of mind while you're building your online course. Time is of the essence.<br> </li> <li>
<strong><u>Delegate.</u></strong><br> Even though my business wasn't at a place that I could hire a virtual assistant for all the tasks that didn't require my attention, I was able to get support for some tasks. For instance, a friend offered to help run the webinars and a colleague wrote some guest blogs so I could focus my energies on other things. I'm already looking forward to my second launch; I'll be able to hire a VA to cover more duties since enough people enrolled in this first course to cover more of my expenses.<br> </li> <li>
<u><strong>Organize.</strong></u><br> This part came easy for me. If anything, I can be over-organized. Clear structure makes it easier to move forward and systems help you find things quicker. Even so, creating a digital course is A LOT, and then marketing it takes it to a whole new level of moving parts. I'm taking notes as to what improvements I can make in my organizational structures for next time. Everything has a learning curve, so be kind to yourself.<br> </li>
</ol>
<p>Interested in taking this course? <a contents="Click here" data-link-label="yes" data-link-type="page" href="/yes">Click here</a> to learn more.<br>You can also register for my FREE masterclass<br>"<a contents="How to Say No: 5 Keys to Setting (and Keeping!) Strong and Kind Boundaries" data-link-label="SayNo" data-link-type="page" href="/sayno" target="_blank">How to Say No: 5 Keys to Setting (and Keeping!) Strong and Kind Boundaries</a>" <br> </p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a Music Educator and Leadership & Life Coach who's coached hundreds of elite students and managed an internationally -recognized community ensemble in addition to helping overwhelmed overachievers create cultures of joy and empowerment so that they can shine!</em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68800412022-02-01T07:00:00-07:002022-02-01T07:00:01-07:00How to Get Your Work/Life Back to Balanced<p>Do you think that work/life balance is a modern myth?<br><br>The Great Resignation is proving that now, more than ever,<br>people are craving a lifestyle that no longer includes<br>overwhelm and burnout.<br><br>My own experience with both of them<br>forced me to make major changes <br>in my habits, mindset, and work hours.<br><br>I am now more productive in less time,<br>not to mention happier.<br><br><span class="font_large">Here are three ways I got my work/life back to balanced:</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><u><strong>Communicate your challenges.</strong></u><br> Ugh. This was a big one for me. I'd been raised to persevere and not bother anyone.<br> Plus, my career in the music industry taught me not to show weakness. In retrospect,<br> I realize how much more I would've gotten out of my 9 years of applied clarinet lessons<br> if I'd just told my professors where I was struggling. I bet they would've had helpful solutions.<br> Here's the thing...<br> no one knows what you need unless you explain it.<br> People aren't noticing that you're overwhelmed unless you tell them.<br> This isn't about complaining. It's confidently letting people know what you need<br> to be productive, efficient, and creative.</span><br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><strong><u>Ask for support.</u></strong><br> A lot of people have trouble asking for help but have no trouble (or actually enjoy) giving it!<br> Let's ditch that double standard and understand that we all need help from time to time.<br> If someone says yes when they mean no, that's on them, not you.</span><br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><strong><u>Make physical and mental health a priority.</u></strong><br> I had to put my business on hold as I recovered from burnout because I knew I was wasting <br> time and energy trying to carry on. My productivity was awful; my creativity at an all-time low.</span><br> I got myself to the doctor, pulled back to a 3-day work week, and trusted that my business<br> and my finances would be ok. This was my single, best decision of that summer.<br> YOU are your most valuable resource. Your time and energy are not infinite.<br> You can't expect to take care of others if you don't take care of yourself.<br> </li> <li>
<u><strong>Set and Keep Boundaries.</strong></u><br> You do not have an infinite well of time and energy. These are resources that have to be protected.<br> If you don't have enough of either to do the things you love or be fully present with loved ones,<br> your work suffers due to a loss of perspective and joy. Check out the opportunity below.</li>
</ol>
<p>If this resonates with you, and you'd like to learn more, I've got a FREE masterclass coming up on setting boundaries,<br>"How to Say No: 5 Keys to Setting (and Keeping!) Strong and Kind Boundaries." <a contents="Click here" data-link-label="SayNo" data-link-type="page" href="/sayno" target="_blank">Click here</a> to sign up!</p>
<hr><p><em><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a Music Educator and Leadership & Life Coach with over twenty years of experience creating cultures of joy and empowerment for her students, clients, and music ensembles.</em><br><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68749222022-01-25T07:00:00-07:002022-01-26T11:44:22-07:00Are You Frustrated Because Your Habits Aren’t Sticking? <p>So you’ve set up some goals and habits but are you having a hard time making them stick? Have you ever heard of habit stacking? It’s an easy way to create new habits that actually stick – so you continue doing them long-term. </p>
<p>Before we can talk about habit stacking, we need to talk a minute about synaptic pruning? If you remember from high school biology, synapses are simply connections between the neurons (which are brain cells). So basically your brain prunes away connections between neurons that aren’t used to build up those connections that are used more often. </p>
<p>Let’s say you are a musician and play the guitar. If you’ve been playing for 5 – 10 years, then your brain has strengthened the connections between the musical neurons. The more you play, the stronger the connections become. Plus, the connections get faster and improve in efficiency every time you play. So then your skills improve, it’s easier, and the quality of your music is so much better than when you first began, right? (Thank goodness say all the moms out there! </p>
<p>But if you don’t play the guitar, those musical connections in your brain are not being strengthened. So your brain prunes away those unused connections and builds up connections for other things you are focusing on. </p>
<p>That’s one reason a young child isn’t as proficient as an adult. The child doesn’t have those connections yet even though there are many possibilities of connections. But adults have pruned away many connections while improving strong connections in the things they are good at doing. </p>
<p><strong>So how does all this relate to habit stacking? </strong></p>
<p>B.J. Fogg wrote an interesting book called Tiny Habits in which he explains habit stacking as a useful tool to develop new habits. Every habit you build does so because of synaptic pruning. The more you do something, the more efficient the connections. And what are habits? Basically something you do so often you do almost without thinking about it. </p>
<p>You already have many strong habits you do each day, right? Things your brain remembers to do almost automatically. Things like: </p>
<p>Taking a shower every morning or at night before bed <br>Making coffee or tea each morning <br>Brushing your teeth after meals </p>
<p>So you can take advantage of those strong connections and habits you have already established to build new habits. </p>
<p>We use the connection of behavior when building new habits. All you have to do is identify a current habit you do each day and then just stack (or add) your new behavior on top. So think of a strong habit you do each day. This will be your CUE to then do the new habit. </p>
<p>It’s easy. Use this phrase: “After _____________ (current habit), I will _____________ (new habit).” </p>
<p><strong>Here are some ideas: </strong></p>
<p>After I pour my cup of coffee in the morning, I will meditate or pray for one minute. <br>After I take off my work shoes, I will immediately change into my workout clothes. <br>After I eat dinner, I will immediately go brush my teeth (to decrease cravings or eating dessert late at night). <br>After I set out my coffee mug, I will also set out an empty glass (to remind me to drink water in the morning as the coffee is brewed). </p>
<p>See how simple that is? </p>
<p>Remember, your current habits are already built into your brain. So just add a new one onto that one. Those patterns and behaviors already strengthened will be the link between the old and the new habit. This increases the odds you will stick to your new habit. </p>
<p>Hope that was helpful. It’s been beneficial for me and also my private clients to just make simple and easy baby steps when trying to improve health in a “happier and gentler” way. And if you have health issues like autoimmune or digestive issues or are a busy person (and who isn’t?), setting simple habits with baby steps makes life a little easier, right? </p>
<p>And speaking of habits – If you’d like to learn some more small steps to help you decrease fatigue, belly bloat, and pain and increase your healthy habits this year, contact me here for a free discovery call. We can talk and see if we’d be a good fit to work together to help you be all you were created to be. </p>
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<p><a contents="Leah Cheshire" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://nurturingyourlife.com/contact/" target="_blank">Leah Cheshire</a>, MCD,CCC-SLP, NBC-HWC, is a national board certified health and wellness coach and a speech-language pathologist who works primarily with women who have fatigue, brain fog, weight issues, digestive issues, and autoimmune problems using small steps through nutritional and lifestyle modifications.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68552112022-01-18T09:00:00-07:002022-01-18T09:00:01-07:003 Ways to Stop the Anxiety of Overwhelm<p>One of the signs of <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelm</a> is anxiety - that's the wave of panic that hits<br>when you feel that you have too much to do and don't know where to start<br>or even if it's <em>possible</em> to get it all done!<br><br>It can happen when something gets added to your workload<br>or you realize you've made a mistake that you have to fix<br>that will cost you a lot of time.<br><br>It may seem impossible to take time for anything that's not work-related,<br>but that's exactly what you need to do to take away anxiety's power.<br><br><br><span class="font_large">3 Ways to Stop the Anxiety of Overwhelm:</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<strong>Set aside time for yourself.</strong><br> You are your greatest resource! You can't constantly be depleting your energy and expect to work at your best.<br> Make time alone a priority. Mindfulness actually creates the illusion of more time, which will ease your anxiety.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Stay present.</strong><br> Anxiety is based on future outcomes. Keep yourself present by practicing deep breathing and taking breaks.<br> Focus on what is in front of you at this moment. One thing at a time.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Set intentions for the day that are not work-related.</strong><br> If all your brain sees is an endless amount of work, you can bet you're going to feel anxious.<br> Remember to make life worth living. Doing things that bring you joy will give you a better perspective <br> on your workload and allow your brain a break so that you can be more efficient when it's time to work.<br> </li>
</ol>
<p>Anxiety is a gift. (Wait, what?!!!) That's right! It's letting you know that something is wrong. That way you are working and thinking about work is not serving you. <em>Anxiety is trying to compel you to change</em>. Not paying attention to it may lead to things worse than <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelm</a>.</p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach. <a contents="Sign up" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">Sign up</a> for weekly messages of inspiration and leadership sent to your inbox, and receive the FREE guide <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."' data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."</a></em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68551952022-01-11T09:00:00-07:002022-01-11T09:00:01-07:004 Ways You May Be Causing Your Own Overwhelm and What to Do About It<p>It's tempting to blame feeling <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a> on your workload<br>and people who seem to take advantage of your time and energy<br>or even on the fallout from the pandemic.<br><br>Have you noticed how some people are able to get tons done <br>and never seem to be <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a> or stressed out?<br><br>You can bet they're taking responsibility for their work/life balance<br>and not allowing others to compromise their values and priorities.<br><br><br><span class="font_large">Here's 4 ways you may be causing your own <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelm</a>:</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><strong>You're not setting boundaries.</strong></span><br> Don't feel guilty for making yourself a priority! You are your greatest resource;<br> treat your time and energy with respect! The only way others can waste your time and energy<br> is if you allow them.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>You're not aware of your priorities.</strong><br> Take time to figure out what you truly value. That makes it easier for you to prioritize.<br> You'll have better work/life balance and be more confident enforcing those boundaries.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>You don't recognize your worth.</strong><br> People can and will take advantage of you if you don't recognize how valuable you are.<br> Communicate your worth by speaking and behaving with confidence about your abilities.<br> No more self-effacing talk or trying to help others before your own work is done.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>You don't have a vision for success.</strong><br> Decide what you want to achieve long-term. When you know where you want to go,<br> it's much easier to find a direct path to get there. Not having a vision<br> leaves you open to distractions of little importance.</li>
</ol>
<p>YOU are your most important resource. Treat yourself accordingly, and you will be teaching others<br>how to treat you as well. Be kind to yourself and your brain by <a contents="stopping overwhelm" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">stopping overwhelm</a> and giving yourself<br>the attention and time you deserve to process life right now. You can't control most of what is going on in the world,<br>but you CAN manage your time and energy.</p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach. Get weekly messages of inspiration and leadership sent directly to your inbox and receive the FREE, simple workbook <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm"' data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm"</a></em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68551832022-01-04T09:00:00-07:002022-01-04T09:00:01-07:00What to Do When You Have Too Much to Do<p>So often feelings of <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelm</a> come from having too much to do.<br><br>Particularly when I was in grad school, I felt <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a> by the sheer number of things<br>I had to do to get my degree. Every day felt like climbing a mountain. It wasn't until I became burned out<br>that I understood just how important it was to manage my workload, time, and energy. <br><br>Recovering from burnout and keeping it from happening again became a priority.<br>What I learned has not only helped myself, but also my clients to <a contents="overcome overwhelm" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">overcome overwhelm</a> <br>before it gets to burnout and change attitudes towards work/life balance for the better.<br><br><span class="font_large">Here are 5 strategies to help you when you have too much to do:</span></p>
<ol> <li>
<strong><span class="font_regular">Say no.</span></strong><br> Setting and enforcing boundaries helps protect your time and energy. You can do anything,<br> but you can't do everything. Every no to something that doesn't serve you, is a yes to your goals.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Prioritize your workload.</strong><br> Find a system that helps you keep track of your most important tasks as well as deadlines<br> so that you know what needs your attention right now and what can wait.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Schedule and take breaks.</strong><br> Your brain needs time to process information so that you can see the big picture<br> and make decisions that increase your productivity and efficiency. Not taking breaks<br> ends up costing you time in the long run.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Delegate.</strong><br> Some tasks don't need your personal touch. Figure out what part of your workload you can delegate.<br> If that's not possible, see what chores at home you can hire out or delegate to family members.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Manage yourself.</strong><br> Warren Buffett coined this term in a <a contents="recent article at Inc." data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://www.inc.com/marcel-schwantes/warren-buffett-says-what-separates-successful-people-from-everyone-else-really-comes-down-to-a-2-letter-word.html?cid=sf01002" target="_blank">recent article at Inc.</a> Instead of managing time, manage yourself<br> by limiting distractions, eliminating poor habits, and focusing on those things that yield the greatest results.</li>
</ol>
<p>There will always be more work to do, but you only have one life. Make choices that you won't regret later.<br><br>Years in the future, will you really have wished you'd worked more...<br>or will you realize how much of life you've missed out on?<br> </p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach. Sign up for weekly messages of inspiration and leadership sent directly to your inbox and receive the free, simple workbook <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."' data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm."</a></em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68344042021-12-26T18:18:53-07:002022-01-02T16:14:18-07:00Learn This Before Turning 50<p>I turned 50 this year and honestly, it was just another day.</p>
<p>The magic of 50 is that my "just another day"<br>is at a whole different level than it has ever been.<br>I realized how much more empowered I am<br>than at any other time in my life.<br><br>I started to make a list of all the things that had gotten me to this point.</p>
<h3>Here are the things I hope you learn by the time you turn 50<i>.</i>
</h3>
<ul> <li>to say no and not feel guilty.</li> <li>to understand that feeling left out is worse than being part of anything in which you don't feel valued or respected.</li> <li>to see your worth and the value of your time and energy.</li> <li>to believe you're beautiful.</li> <li>to give yourself permission to be in love with your life<em> and yourself</em>.</li> <li>to do things you want to do, not things you think (or anyone else thinks) you should do.</li> <li>to realize that being woke isn't a destination and that you have to be open to growth and change at any age.</li> <li>to not define yourself by your profession or titles.</li> <li>to stand up for yourself when you're treated unfairly.</li> <li>to create boundaries that bring people closer to you, not push them away.</li> <li>to embrace that putting yourself first means being able to help loved ones more, not less.</li>
</ul>
<p>The most important thing I've learned is to keep learning.<br>That's how you level up your own culture and start attracting things, opportunities,<br>and people into your life that foster even more of your personal evolution.<br><br>Turning 50 wasn't a destination because <em>there are no destinations.</em><br>It's all about the journey!</p>
<p>_________________________________________________________________________________________</p>
<p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach. Sign up for weekly emails of inspiration and leadership tips and grab the free worksheet <a contents='"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm"' data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">"5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm"</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68463252021-12-19T19:22:09-07:002021-12-19T19:22:09-07:004 Ways to Feel Less Lonely During the Holidays<p>The challenges of a multi-year pandemic can be <a contents="overwhelming" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelming</a> during the holidays.<br><br>For me, the pandemic hasn't effected the holiday season near as much as the death of my parents.<br><br>Even though that was 10 years ago and I'm a grown adult,<br>I still get lonely and sad, as I suspect many people do this time of year<br>when confronted with their own stories of loss.<br><br>I also still feel joy and happiness.<br><br>I've accepted all of this as part of the journey,<br>and have found ways to cope<br>that take the sting out of the loneliness.</p>
<h3>Here are my 4 favorite ways to move past the holiday blues:</h3>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Take stock of the past year, focusing on the people with whom you shared joyful moments.</strong><br> Write them an email, card, or text and thank them for being part of your journey at those times.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Honor your loved ones who are no longer with you </strong>by lighting a candle, using something of theirs,<br> or some type of simple ritual. This will remind you how much they are still a part of your life<br> through their influence and your memories of them.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Think of the people who wanted more of your time recently.</strong> Give them a call or make a plan<br> to do something with them. When we're focusing on what we don't have, we often miss out on appreciating<br> the people and things we <em>do</em> have. <br> </li> <li>
<strong>Cherish your own life by giving yourself time and attention. </strong><br> Watch your favorite movie. Read a new book. Do something you've always wanted to do.<br> </li>
</ul>
<p>What we see in seasonal advertisements or shows is often idealized. Our memories of holidays past<br>can also be idealized as we remember the best of times with nostalgia and forget the worst. <br>The time that matters most is the time you have right now. <br><br>That's not to say your sadness is wrong or should be dismissed. Rather, it's a messenger,<br>and it's reminding you to get out of your head and actively appreciate what you have right now.</p>
<hr><p><span class="font_small"><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach who helps overachievers create more joy and empowerment.</em></span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68366732021-12-14T13:00:00-07:002021-12-14T13:00:02-07:005 Ways for People-pleasers to Say NO<p>Saying "no" and holding your ground can be hard for people-pleasers,<br>especially during the holidays.<br><br>Being a recovering people-pleaser myself, I understand that it can even be<br>physically painful to say "no."<br><br>But trust me...<br><span class="font_large">it hurts more to sabotage your own self-interests and values</span>.<br><br>Saying "no" may not be natural to you, but it's not too late to learn,<br>especially when you could be setting yourself up for<br>self-abandonment in the long run.<br><br>In the immediate future, <br>if you don't learn how to set boundaries,<br>you may feel <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a> and unable to be truly present for your loved ones.<br><br><strong><em>Valuing everyone else's time and energy more than you value your own<br>may be a sign that you don't recognize the worth of your own amazing life.</em></strong></p>
<p>By not saying "no," you're constantly telling yourself that you matter less,<br>and your body and mind believe you! <br>That stuff adds up and eventually becomes a kind of self-loathing.</p>
<p><u><span class="font_large">Here are 5 Ways for People-pleasers to Say NO</span></u></p>
<ol> <li>
<strong><span class="font_regular"> "I'll get back to you."</span></strong><br> You don't have to make a decision right away, especially if your instinct is to always say, "yes."<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Set limitations.</strong><br> Let yourself say, "yes," but limit the amount of time or scope of the project.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>"No thank you."</strong><br> This seems too simple to work, but if you say it nicely then turn around and walk away,<br> it's quite effective. You don't owe anyone an explanation.<br> </li> <li>
<b>"That doesn't work for me."</b><br> If you are pressed for an explanation, tell them that you have your reasons. That will change the power dynamic, and you'll feel less pressure.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>Say it with confidence.</strong><br> Whatever you choose to say, say it like you're protecting the time and energy of your closest loved one (because that's exactly what you're doing!). Every time you say "no" to something that doesn't serve you, is a "yes" to yourself.<br> </li>
</ol>
<p><em>Saying "no" isn't selfish if saying "yes" isn't something you really mean. </em><br><br>You can be gracious and kind while not allowing others to take advantage of your kind-hearted nature,<br>even if it's family and even if it's the holiday season. </p>
<p><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68316952021-12-07T08:00:00-07:002021-12-18T05:31:09-07:007 Signs of Overwhelm and What to Do About Them<p>Getting my doctorate was overwhelming. Surprising? <br>No, not for most people, but it was for me.<br><br>I was the kind of person who rose to a challenge and loved working hard. <br>That irritating person in college who had to get permission from the registar's office<br>to take extra classes each semester, handed everything in on time, got great grades,<br>and was happy about all that? <br><br><em>That was me.</em></p>
<p>Had I known what the signs of <a contents="overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelm</a> were, I may have been able to keep myself<br>from developing burnout, which cost me weeks of lost productivity, if not more.<br><br>So if you're finding yourself uninspired about the upcoming day or week or month, <br>you may have figured out that you're feeling overwhelmed. <br><br><em>However, the following signs of overwhelm may surprise you.</em></p>
<h3>
<br>7 Signs of <a contents="Overwhelm" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">Overwhelm</a> and What to Do About Them:</h3>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Anxiety</strong><br> Anxiety is all about the future. If you feel anxious about all the work you have to do, you may find your heart and mind racing. The fear of potentially not being able to do everything may be causing the problem. <em>Focus on doing one thing at a time.</em><br> </li> <li>
<strong>Feeling Heavy</strong><br> Working all the time to catch up on the too much work you have to do may have you feeling the burden of overwhelm. <em>Start scheduling in something you love to do. </em> Life is more than work.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>No Enjoyment</strong><br> Not loving a life and career that usually makes you happy is a clear sign of feeling overwhelmed. Your brain needs time to process, and <em>self-reflection will reveal the big picture and reconnect you to why you made your life choices. </em><br> </li> <li>
<strong>No Focus</strong><br> The brain needs time to process change and information. If it doesn't get this time, you're not going to be able to focus since you're overloading your body's central processing unit. <em> Schedule breaks and commit to taking them. </em> <br> </li> <li>
<strong>Stress</strong><br> Being stressed out long-term has serious physical consequences. Get out of your chair every half hour. <em>Do some physical activity every day, even if it's only 20 minutes.</em><br> </li> <li>
<strong>Physical Problems</strong><br> It's common for mental and emotional issues to manifest physically, particularly in the form of pain. While it's important to go to the doctor for physical problems, you may want to ask yourself if they could be related to overwhelm and <em>start slowing down and delegating your workload.</em><br> </li> <li>
<strong>Mood Swings</strong><br> Stress will effect your hormones, and hormones can effect your mood. Feelings like resentment, guilt, and anger may be signs of self-abandonment, resulting from continually ignoring your own needs or putting others' needs above your own. <em>Make sure to start setting and enforcing boundaries.</em>
</li>
</ul>
<p>____________________________________________________________________________________________</p>
<p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a music educator and leadership & life coach who specializes in helping overwhelmed leaders create cultures of joy and empowerment. Grab her free guide "5 Steps for Overcoming Overwhelm" <a contents="here." data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">here.</a></em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68255342021-11-30T11:14:21-07:002022-05-19T05:09:51-06:005 Ways to Destress the Holiday Season<p>When I was a band director, my mother would insist that I send out holiday cards to my many brothers and sisters. December is one of the busiest times of the year for band directors. She had no idea the stress she was adding with her request. The stress came from not being able to make my mother happy in this regard, because I had no intention and no energy to do as she asked.</p>
<p>You don't have to do all the things you're "supposed" to do to have an enjoyable and meaningful holiday season.<br><br><em><span class="font_regular">Many of the things you're "supposed" to do<br>are not expectations others have of you,<br>but that you have of yourself.</span></em></p>
<p><span class="font_large">Here are 5 ways to destress the holiday season:</span></p>
<ol> <li>Change your priorities by changing your mindset.<br> Do you think you have to buy your loved ones everything they want? You may have a mindset problem. Figure out what the holidays mean to you. Do you really want it to be about gifts and decorations? Or do you want it to be about meaningful time with family and friends?<br> </li> <li>Be present.<br> Thinking about what preparations should be made may be causing you to become distracted and making you miss some of the beauty happening right now. Being present is a gift you can give to yourself that costs nothing but your attention and gives back in emotional centeredness and joy. Incorporate breaks, mindfulness, and self-care into your daily routine.<br> </li> <li>Let it be easy.<br> You don't have to do all the traditions in the ways they've been done before. Create new traditions that are less <a contents="overwhelming" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelming</a>. Everyone would rather have you in a good mood than watch you be stressed out.<br> </li> <li>Limit technology.<br> You already know how easy it is to get sucked into screen time and lose precious moments with loved ones. Set technology limits and abide by them.<br> </li> <li>Stop competing.<br> How you choose to celebrate the holiday season is a reflection of your own values. Don't try to keep up with what others are doing. You don't have to match their efforts or beat their decorations; you just have to be you.<br> </li>
</ol>
<p>Cherish the love and joy and peace that the holiday season can bring, and leave behind everything you feel that you "should" do or that brings you stress. You get to choose what you want the season to mean to you, and you get to choose how to celebrate it!</p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a musician and leadership & life coach. You can subscribe to her weekly newsletters of inspiration and leadership tips, and get the free, simple worksheet "<a contents="5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm (and creating the life you deserve!)." data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://crafty-artist-1919.ck.page/d75fee2a60" target="_blank">5 Steps to Overcoming Overwhelm (and creating the life you deserve!).</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68170682021-11-23T09:00:00-07:002021-11-24T08:21:47-07:00The One Thing Americans Get Wrong about Gratitude<p>Thanksgiving can run the gamut from wonderful to significantly less so, depending on your circumstances.</p>
<p><strong><span class="font_regular">We can easily feel victimized by the circumstances the last few years have dealt us. </span></strong><br>Depression has skyrocketed. <br>Languishing is a term that we've come to know. <br>Loss is tangible and ever-present.<br>Being <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a> is the norm.<br><br><strong>For many Americans, Thanksgiving is about being grateful, at least for a day.</strong></p>
<p>Going around the table and having loved ones say what they are most thankful for is not going to cut it this year, though.<br>We need positivity, resilience, contentment, mindfulness, and joy more than ever, and practicing gratitude can be a gateway to all of that. It can also reduce stress, improve relationships, and boost your self-esteem.<br><br><em>Most Americans are missing out on the benefits of regularly practicing gratitude.</em><br><br>Practicing gratitude on a regular basis means that our brains are focusing more on the positive things around us.<br>Those things have always been there; we're just bad at noticing them if we're focusing on the negative.<br>Just the act of noticing positive things, attracts more positive things. <br><br><em>Gratitude fundamentally changes how you see the world as well as what you attract.</em></p>
<p><strong>If you want to get the most out of the holiday season, express gratitude more frequently than one day.</strong> <br>Start listing what you're thankful for every day. Counting your blessings is a legitimate way to pull yourself out of the downward spiral of noticing all the negative things around you.</p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="About Me" data-link-type="page" href="/about-me" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a Leadership & Life Coach and music educator. She is known for her straight-forward communication style and getting to heart of what is holding her clients and students back from progress. Her mission is to inspire awareness and empowerment so that others can be agents of positive change in the world.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68109162021-11-15T19:43:41-07:002021-12-21T12:37:52-07:004 Reasons to Practice Forgiveness<p>One of my classes in grad school consisted almost entirely of Midwesterners, much to the professor's delight. He looked forward to our good-natured and polite demeanors topped off with a hearty work ethic. <br><br>One day before class, my colleagues and I were discussing the intricacies of our Midwest culture.<br><br>"Maybe we choose our actions carefully because we know we're only one person removed from someone who knows our mother," I surmised. Being from South Dakota, with an entire state population of under a million people, this was legitimate conjecture.<br><br>My colleagued agreed and added, "And you do NOT want to cross a Midwestern woman because they will never, ever forget. They will hold it against you FOREVER!"<br><br>My heart sank. That was me. I held on to things, neither forgetting nor forgiving.<br>I had been keeping a subconscious running tally of the transgressions of my loved ones.</p>
<p>Realizing this made me want to change, so I started looking for reasons to forgive so that I'd be compelled to change my behavior.<br><br><u><span class="font_large"><strong>These are the 4 main reasons I used to convince myself to forgive:</strong></span></u></p>
<ol> <li>
<span class="font_large">Forgiveness is about you.</span><br> The other person may never be affected by your holding a grudge against them,<br> but you will. Forgiveness frees your mind and heart from the weight of carrying around heavy resentment and hard feelings.<br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">Forgiveness allows you to live more fully in the present.</span><br> Ruminating on previous offenses means your mind is spending time in the past, which in turn means you aren't able to devote your entire attention to the present.<br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">Forgiveness creates positivity.</span><br> Holding on to past grievances has a negative effect on your energy. Forgiveness fosters a more positive outlook on life as you let go of that negative luggage.<br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">Forgiveness allows others to evolve.</span><br> When we create a picture of someone based on their previous actions, we don't allow for them to grow and change.<br> That also means that when you don't forgive yourself, you are holding yourself back from personal growth.</li>
</ol>
<p>For me, #4 was the most compelling. I hated the thought of holding my loved ones back on their journey of personal growth. I wanted to love and nurture them instead and encourage them to grow. <br><br>Forgiveness may not be something that was given easily in your culture of family or friends or even your work environment, but that doesn't mean it has to continue to be that way. Not only was I able to forgive others more because of these compelling arguments, but I was also able to begin the process of learning to forgive myself. Ultimately, #4 was the most convincing there as well.</p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="Home" data-link-type="page" href="/home" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a music educator and leadership & life coach. Click here to receive the free guide to <a contents="Overcome Being Overwhelmed" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">Overcome Being Overwhelmed</a> and get weekly messages of inspiration and leadership sent directly to your email inbox.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/68024752021-11-08T19:20:32-07:002022-05-19T05:13:00-06:005 Things I Learned about Self-publishing<p>Yesterday I launched my method book <em>Woodwind Improvisatory Techniques of the Classical Era.</em><br><br>The journey was anything but straight and smooth, <br>but what I learned along the way has been priceless.</p>
<p>I started this project 5 years ago,<br>and it is the culmination of two scholarly papers and an independent study,<br>complete with lecture recital.<br><br><strong><em>What I didn't realize when I decided to self-publish<br>is that the process would take so much time<br>and have such a large learning curve.</em></strong><br><br>I could have tried to find a publisher,<br>but having recently gone through the dissertation process,<br>I wanted the control.<br><br>Yes, I had to learn about beta testing, cover bleeds,<br>templates, and reviews, <br><span class="font_large">but what I really enjoyed discovering<br>were the things that had nothing to do with publishing in particular.</span></p>
<ul> <li>
<span class="font_large">There is always a way.</span><br> Get ready to troubleshoot because there will be problems.<br> They may seem unsurmountable, but they are not. <br> Try different ways to fix the problem,<br> and try different ways of thinking about the problem. <br> <strong><em>Embrace the excitement of the challenge to keep frustration at bay.</em></strong><br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">You are never alone.</span><br> <span class="font_regular">Support is just a question away. <em><strong>Don't be afraid to ask for help!</strong></em><br> There is tech support for a lot of the tools you'll need.</span><br> Friends and family can offer a different perspective to a challenge.<br> Talking about your book with others can give you the dose of inspiration you may need.<br> Find out who is excited about your book and ask them to help you promote it.<br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">Deadlines are negotiable.</span><br> Deadlines are there to motivate you to get stuff done,<br> and you should definitely try to hold yourself to them.<br> But life happens.<em> </em>Family crisis, illness, and so many other things are out of your control.<br> <em><strong>People aren't judging you nearly as much as you're judging yourself.</strong></em><br> If they really want it, they'll wait.<br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">Live your life.</span><br> <span class="font_regular">Yes, the journey of self-publishing is exciting AND time consuming,<br> but it shouldn't dictate every aspect of your life.<br> This is a journey, and it doesn't end with the launch.<br> There will always be more marketing/work/business to do.</span><br> Learn to make decisions and then make them right.<br> Don't waste time wondering if it was the right decision.<br> <em><strong>Enjoying the journey is more important than trying to achieve perfection.</strong></em><br> </li> <li>
<span class="font_large">Believe in your worth.</span><br> <span class="font_regular">There will be haters.</span><br> This is a good sign; it means you are doing something big.<br> When you start doing big things, ultimately there will be people who will feel smaller because of it<br> or they just may not not realize how rude they are.<br> These people are not your concern.<br> <strong><em>If you believe that your voice needs to get out into the world,<br> that what you're doing is important,<br> no one can stop you.</em></strong>
</li>
</ul>
<p>If you are tenacious about your vision and your ability to help others,<br>I would strongly suggest self-publishing.<br>Even more so if the thought of helping others excites you to your core.<br><br>Its rewards far out-weigh the troubles.<br>(Trouble is actually half the fun!)</p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and Leadership & Life Coach. You can purchase her method book <a contents="here" data-link-label="WW Improvisation Book" data-link-type="page" href="/ww-improvisation-book" target="_blank">here</a>.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/67950662021-11-02T11:10:57-06:002021-11-02T11:10:57-06:00How Writing the Story of Yourself Leads to Success<p><em>The story you tell yourself may be the most accurate indicator of success.</em></p>
<p>I used to think there was only one truth,<br>when what I really thought was true was my perspective.<br><br>Your perspective is the story you believe to be true.<br>Someone else can have a different perspective,<br>and that can also be true.</p>
<p>Deep stuff, right?!!!<br><br>But what does it matter?<br><br><strong><em>When it comes to success, the story you tell yourself<br>about yourself<br>(or your perspective of your identity)<br>is a fundamental component.</em></strong><br><br>For example,<br>if you believe you are fundamentally a good person,<br>you may behave in ways you think a good person should behave.</p>
<p>Someone else may think those behaviors are not indicative<br>of someone who is a good person and, therefore,<br>believes you are not fundamentally a good person.</p>
<p>What defines a good person can differ from one perspective to another.<br>You can be seen as a good person AND not as a good person.<br>Neither of you is wrong. There's more than one truth there.</p>
<p>So which truth matters?<br><br>In the short term, the perspective of your manager or team leader<br>or spouse or parent may seem to matter more.</p>
<p><span class="font_large"><em>Ultimately, it's the story you tell yourself,<br>who you really believe yourself to be,<br>that determines your long-term success.</em></span><br><br>Whatever story you feed your brain<br>is similar to data entry to a supercomputer.<br><br>If you tell yourself you're lazy,<br>your brain believes you,<br>and you start noticing just how lazy you are.<br><br>If you tell yourself you're amazing and deserving of success,<br>your brain believes you.<br>and you start noticing just how amazing you are<br>and making plans to be successful.<br><br><em>If you really believe that you're amazing,<br>no amount of failure or mistakes <br>or other people's negative perspectives of you<br>or challenges the Universe throws at you<br>are going to matter.</em></p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and leadership & life coach. You can sign up for her inspirational emails <a contents="here." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here.</a><br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/67651812021-10-26T14:00:00-06:002021-10-26T19:04:54-06:00Why Bother to Reinvent Yourself?<p>If you could change one thing about your lifestyle or work,<br>what would it be?</p>
<p>More than ever, people have reinvented themselves during the pandemic, <br>sometimes in small ways, other times in momentous ones.</p>
<p><em>Breaking old habits and forging a new path can be incredibly challenging.</em><br><br>Why do people bother? <br><br>At the beginning of the pandemic, I pivoted from being a music educator <br>to creating a career as a leadership and life coach.</p>
<p>For me, the benefits have far outweighed the <a contents="fears" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">fears</a> and challenges.</p>
<p><span class="font_large">What are the benefits of reinventing yourself?</span></p>
<ul> <li>better alignment of values throughout your work and home life</li> <li>the excitement of new and different potential outcomes</li> <li>getting unstuck</li> <li>more freedom of choice</li> <li>overcoming limiting beliefs</li> <li>increased self-awareness</li> <li>recognizing your worth</li> <li>being able to graciously assert your worth to others</li> <li>an increase in happiness and positivity</li> <li>feeling less <a contents="overwhelmed" data-link-label="overwhelmed" data-link-type="page" href="/overwhelmed" target="_blank">overwhelmed</a>
</li>
</ul>
<p>A mid-life crisis or a pandemic isn't a prerequisite to creating a new life or career.<br><br>Realizing that there may be better ways of doing things that will make you happier is the first step.<br>You don't even need to make singular life-altering choices.<br><br>Reinventing yourself simply means getting in touch with what you really want<br>and making that happen step by step and day by day.</p>
<hr><p><span class="font_regular">Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician and leadership & life coach who helps leaders create cultures of joy and empowerment. You can sign up for weekly inspirational emails <a contents="here." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here.</a></span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/67649302021-10-19T11:00:00-06:002021-12-23T07:09:31-07:00Would the Real Imposter Syndrome Please Stand Up?<p><em><strong>Do you feel like an imposter?</strong></em></p>
<p><a contents="Imposter syndrome" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Imposter syndrome</a> has taken center stage recently in blogs, articles, speeches, and marketing.<br><br><span class="font_large">What I'm hearing about is not necessarily imposter syndrome, however.</span><br><br><em>Self-doubt and a lack of confidence are part of human nature. We've all had them at some point.</em><br><br>From what I've experienced of imposter syndrome, and from what I've seen my clients deal with,<br>imposter syndrome is much darker and much deeper.<br>This is not to dismiss self-doubt and poor confidence, which can have crippling effects.<br><br><strong>Imposter syndrome is not part of human nature.</strong> <br>I didn't experience it until I was well into my forties.<br><br>For me and some of my clients, imposter syndrome was the result of trauma.<br>This trauma could be of a professional nature or it could be caused by bullying or gaslighting, among other things.</p>
<p>The result is a deep sense of fraudulence, even though you are entirely capable and worthy,<br>and it feels much worse than self-doubt and low confidence.<br>It attacks the core belief of who you are inside and can lead to self-abandonment,<br>valuing everyone else and their needs over your own.</p>
<p><span class="font_large">Imposter syndrome feels gut-wrenchingly awful.</span><br><br>Although some of the same tools and strategies can often help<br>the effects of imposter syndrome, self-doubt, and lack of confidence,<br>imposter syndrome is not as common, is often more detrimental,<br>and takes more deep work to overcome than its companions.</p>
<p>One you've attacked it at the foundation, however; it's actually easier to beat,<br>while self-doubt and low self-confidence can resurface more frequently throughout our lives.</p>
<p>There's no need to spend one more minute feeling like an imposter or a fraud.<br> </p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician and leadership & life coach. Receive the free guide <a contents="3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome</a> and sign up for her inspirational emails.<br> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/67598562021-10-12T07:00:00-06:002021-10-13T09:32:24-06:00Creativity as a Pandemic Panacea<p>As a musician, I've learned that making time and space for my creativity to flow is a wonderful gift to myself. The pandemic made me realize how powerful the act of creating can be. When I was in the middle of a creative project, I was pandemic-proof. The marketing and logistics of that project however, areas separate from the actual creative process, put me in states of overwhelm or languishing, a term most of us never considered before Covid.</p>
<p>Now, in the middle of another major creative project, I feel a sense of excitement that seems to be insulating me from the pandemic flux syndrome I'm hearing about from the media and my clients. </p>
<p>Can you benefit from setting aside time to be creative even if you're not in a creative line of work? Absolutely.</p>
<h3>Here are some of the ways creativity can improve your lifestyle:</h3>
<ul> <li>Stress relief</li> <li>Mindfulness</li> <li>Self-expression</li> <li>Increased self-awareness</li> <li>A sense of empowerment</li> <li>Decrease in depression and anxiety</li> <li>Increased resilience</li> <li>Mood enhancing</li> <li>Improved self-esteem</li> <li>Increased cognitive function</li> <li><a contents="Confidence" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Confidence</a></li>
</ul>
<p><span class="font_large">You don't need to be in a creative industry<br>to reap the benefits of creativity.</span></p>
<p>All of us have creativity inside that's just waiting to help us escape the trials of daily life. Not only is music a creative outlet for me, but the educator in me loves to innovate strategies and plans for my clients, as well as outline speeches. <br><br><em>What about you? What's something creative you'd love to try? <br>Or maybe there's a way you've loved to create in the past, that you've stepped away from?</em><br>It could be painting or creative writing or learning to play an instrument.<br><br><span class="font_large">When you can create with other people, it's even more powerful.</span></p>
<p><span class="font_regular">Creating with others creates a community and can give you a feeling of belonging.</span></p>
<p><span class="font_regular">What are you waiting for? Sign up for that piano class. Join that performance group. Dust off those paint brushes.</span><br>Turn the corner on pandemic languishing and prepare yourself for a more fulfilling life.</p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician and leadership and life coach. Sign up for inspirational emails <a contents="here." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here.</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/67649172021-10-05T09:00:00-06:002021-10-05T09:30:02-06:006 Reasons to Practice Gratitude<p><img src="//d10j3mvrs1suex.cloudfront.net/u/307162/5b6190353e432e6db5c39a21993b4b33aa61d3ea/original/nathan-dumlao-fs-l0xqlc90-unsplash.jpg/!!/meta:eyJzcmNCdWNrZXQiOiJiemdsZmlsZXMifQ==/b:W10=.jpg" class="size_l justify_center border_" /><span class="font_small">Photo by Nathan Dumlao at Unsplash</span></p>
<p>As I'm winding down the writing/editing/publishing work of my upcoming book,<br>my emotions are all over the place.</p>
<p>Some of this "feeling all the feels" comes from pushing myself to make deadlines,<br>but some of it comes from a soul-aching sense of gratitude.<br><br>This book is 5 years in the making,<br>and it started with a graduate project in my Classical seminar class.</p>
<p>Thankfully, the professor gave me a lot of freedom, and autonomy was exactly what I needed.<br>My curiosity was allowed free rein, and I feel in love with all the tangents of the improv world.</p>
<p>His encouragement led to my submission and acceptance to present my work at an international conference.<br><br><span class="font_large">My fire was fueled,</span><br>and I continued to go down the rabbit hole with an independent study and secondary project on the same topic.<br><br><em>More amazing input.<br>More words of encouragement.<br>More support.<br>More inspiration.</em><br><br>Then the beta-testing...the feedback was phenomenal!</p>
<p>Proofreading the final version, I realized how much better it was than what I'd originally conceived.<br>The (constructive and even not-so-constructive) feedback created something of which I was incredibly proud.</p>
<p><span class="font_large">It hasn't always been easy.</span></p>
<p>When morale was low or difficulties during this process seemed insurmountable, <br>gratitude was a powerful tool for me to get connected with my spark again.<br><br><span class="font_large">Practicing gratitude has powerful benefits.</span></p>
<ul> <li><span class="font_regular"><strong>Inspiration</strong><br> Gratitude is actually a catalyst for additional inspiration.</span></li> <li>
<span class="font_regular"><strong>Motivation</strong></span><br> Focusing on gratitude motivated me to keep working on getting the book out into the world.</li> <li>
<strong>Positivity</strong><br> My thoughts became focused on the positive benefits of my book,<br> and these pushed out the negative thoughts associated with all the hard work I had left to do.</li> <li>
<strong>Connection</strong><br> I was part of something bigger than myself. It took a community of support to get me to this point.</li> <li>
<strong>Altruism</strong><br> The call to help others through my work took precedent over my ego's attachment to the achievement.</li> <li>
<a contents="Confidence" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank"><strong>Confidence</strong></a><br> I felt like all of these people were cheering me on, which melted away any insecurities.</li>
</ul>
<p>Thinking about the positive influences we've received from others makes us appreciate them,<br>which in turn makes us appreciate so much more around us and within us.</p>
<hr><p><a contents="Dr. Nancy Williams" data-link-label="About Me" data-link-type="page" href="/about-me" target="_blank">Dr. Nancy Williams</a> is a musician and life & leadership coach. You can sign up for inspirational emails <a contents="here." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here.</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66986782021-07-26T15:26:45-06:002021-11-21T23:41:38-07:005 Ways a Performing Artist Mindset Helps with Networking<p>Networking in person is a thrill when compared to the virtual options popular during the pandemic.</p>
<p>However, I've found my networking skills to be a bit rusty recently.<br> </p>
<p>Have you found yourself...</p>
<ul> <li>talking too much about yourself?</li> <li>feeling awkward?</li> <li>not knowing what to say?</li> <li>being stressed out?</li>
</ul>
<p><br><em>As a professional musician, I'd acquired a healthy mindset about performing,<br>and I noticed that in-person networking was starting to feel like a performance<br>in a good way.</em><br> </p>
<p><u>Performing, like networking, is a way to connect and engage with others.</u><br> </p>
<h2><span class="font_regular">Here are 5 ways in which a performance artist mindset<br>helps create more meaningful network connections.</span></h2>
<ol> <li> <p><span class="font_large">Warm up.</span><br> <br> Performers warm up their bodies, minds, and instruments before a performance.<br> This translates into <strong>taking time to get grounded before going into a room full of people.</strong><br> Take deep breaths, say mantras, or meditate to get grounded.</p> </li> <li> <p><span class="font_large">Be true to the music.</span><br> <br> <span class="font_regular">Focusing on the value of the music takes attention away from ego and feeling self-conscious.<br> For networking,<strong> remember what your goal is: connection. </strong><br> It's not all about you. It's about creating a community that helps and supports each other. <br> Ask yourself how you can help and support others.</span></p> </li> <li> <p><span class="font_large">Let go of mistakes.</span><br> <br> Professional musicians still make mistakes; they're just less noticeable because<br> performing artists are masters of recovering from them.<br> Don't let a networking mis-step make you anxious or cause you to lose confidence.<br> <strong>Let go of any tendency to focus on mistakes</strong> later as well.</p> </li> <li> <p><span class="font_large">Be gracious.</span><br> <br> The best performers are grateful for every person in the audience,<br> happy to receive their excited energy,<br> and hopeful that they've made their lives a little better.<br> <strong>Learn to be gracious to everyone you meet.</strong></p> </li> <li> <p><span class="font_large">Get feedback.</span><br> <br> <span class="font_regular">Performers usually participate in some type of reception following the performance.<br> Audience members tell them what they liked (and sometimes what they didn't like).</span><br> <strong>Don't forget to follow up on your networking the next day<br> by sending an email or connecting on social media.</strong><br> The way this allows you to foster your connections<br> is similar to the way audience feedback fosters future audience engagement.</p> </li>
</ol>
<p>It may seem cold to equate networking with performing,<br>but when you realize the strategies and mindsets of the best performance artists,<br>networking actually becomes more authentic.<br><br>Networking is a skill, just like performing.<br>Practicing will make you better.<br><br>You've likely been a little out of practice with the pandemic, <br>so leave judgment behind and enjoy the company of fellow humans!</p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a Culture Consultant and Coach who helps leaders create cultures of joy and empowerment, as well as a musician and educator. <a contents="&nbsp;Sign up&nbsp;" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank"> Sign up </a>for her weekly emails of inspiration and receive the free guide<a contents='&nbsp;"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome."' data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank"> "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome."</a></p>
<p> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66936122021-07-20T19:35:17-06:002022-05-20T01:09:10-06:008 Ways to Get Your Ideas Heard<p>Has the following scenario happened to you?</p>
<p> <span class="font_small"><strong> My suggestion was great, but everyone continued as if I hadn't said anything.</strong></span></p>
<p><span class="font_small"><strong> Worse yet, one of my colleagues brought up the same suggestion a few minutes later,<br><em> and everyone loved it.</em></strong></span></p>
<p>According to a <a contents="A recent study" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers.cfm?abstract_id=3704122" target="_blank">recent study</a>, women get interrupted more often, are receiving less attention when they speak, and are given less credit in comparison with their male colleagues.</p>
<p>Yes, this is a gender issue,<br>but it's not <em>only</em> a gender issue.</p>
<p><strong>Anyone can have the same problem if they are perceived as less influential.</strong></p>
<p>So what do you do when you have a fabulous idea,<br>but you know all too well that it may be dismissed?<br><br><em>It's easy to get frustrated or angry,<br>but chances are that will only cause others to dismiss you even more.</em></p>
<h3>Here are 8 ways to get your ideas heard.</h3>
<ul> <li> <p><em><strong><u><span class="font_regular">Be confident in your own influence.</span></u></strong></em><br> This is not only about self-confidence, but also about passion for your idea<br> and belief in its right (as well as your own) to be heard. </p> </li> <li> <p><em><strong><u>Use names.</u></strong></em><br> Making a conversation personal will get their attention.</p> </li> <li> <p><em><strong><u>Maintain eye contact.</u></strong></em><br> Speak directly to and make eye contact with an influential colleague.<br> This will make them feel more accountable for what you're saying.</p> </li> <li> <p><em><strong><u>Speak clearly and with projection.</u></strong></em><br> A strong idea spoken about meekly will come across as a weak idea.</p> </li> <li> <p><em><strong><u>Use intentional pauses.</u></strong></em><br> The unexpected draws attention to it. <br> A brief but confident pause in speech can draw in listeners.</p> </li> <li> <p><u><em><strong>Support your argument.</strong></em></u><br> State the idea's value, supporting it with solid proof or reasoning.</p> </li> <li> <p><em><strong><u>Insist on others' attention.</u></strong></em><br> Ask for feedback. Question what they think about specifics.<br> Don't let conversation pivot without proof that you've been heard.</p> </li> <li> <p><em><strong><u>Don't accept dismissal.</u></strong></em><br> If someone is trying to push your idea aside without proper discussion,<br> ask them to tell you precisely what they don't like about it.<br> If the idea can be reworked to avoid the objections, state how.</p> </li>
</ul>
<p>Even if the idea isn't accepted, you'll know why<br><em>and you'll feel heard and understood.</em></p>
<p>If the idea is brought up later by someone else,<br>you can remind everyone of the details of the discussion,<br>and they'll be more likely to recall the idea as yours.</p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a Culture Consultant and Coach as well as a musician and educator. <a contents="Sign up" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Sign up</a> for her weekly emails of inspiration and receive the free guide <a contents='"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome."' data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">"3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome."</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66849132021-07-11T12:49:21-06:002021-09-23T00:25:55-06:00Are You Too Positive? Your Positivity May Be Toxic if You're Doing This <p>I once had a colleague who was incredibly positive all the time.</p>
<p>I loved it! He gave off great energy and was nice to be around,<br><br><span class="font_large"><em>but I totally didn't trust him.</em></span></p>
<p>Ultimately, I noticed that he tended to dismiss any conflict<br>or comment that could be construed as negative.<br>He'd try to spin people in a different direction<br>to take focus of off whatever issue was unpleasant to him.</p>
<p>That's particularly unsettling to a person who may be going through,<br>well, life.<br><br>His behavior sends a message that only positive thoughts or actions are appropriate.</p>
<p><strong><span class="font_regular">It's great to find the positive in a bad situation,<br>but you can't dismiss those who see the situation differently.</span></strong></p>
<p><em>Dismissing others' emotions, thoughts, or perspectives that don't suit you<br>also dismisses their connection to you.<br>It makes you seem untrustworthy and inauthentic.</em></p>
<p><span class="font_large">Empathy keeps your positivity from becoming toxic<br>and builds connection.</span></p>
<p><span class="font_regular">This doesn't mean you have to play the role of therapist.<br>Simply try to put yourself in their place.<br>Acknowledge their feelings, thoughts, and perspective<br>instead of dismissing them.</span></p>
<p> </p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a Musician, Educator, and Culture Coach & Consultant who helps leaders create cultures of joy and empowerment. Sign up for her email list <a contents="here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here</a> to get leadership tips and personal inspiration sent directly to your inbox.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66803992021-07-06T14:09:14-06:002022-04-28T15:27:34-06:00Inspiration is Overrated - 3 Ways to Just Get It Done<p>It's great when you can get in the flow and work gets done easily and quickly.</p>
<p>What about those days when your flow isn't flowing, no matter what you do?<br>Do you wait for inspiration to hit<br>or do you push yourself to just do the things?</p>
<p>The answer can be complicated, especially when dealing with burnout.</p>
<p>Let's say that you're doing everything you can to manage burnout and overwhelm.<br>- You're taking time off.<br>- You're setting and keeping boundaries.<br>- You have a job you love.<br>- You're socializing and spending time in nature.<br>- You're eating well, exercising, and getting enough quality sleep.<br>- You regularly write down your goals to keep you connected to your vision...</p>
<h4>
<em>but the inspiration still won't come.</em><br> </h4>
<h2><strong>You can motivate yourself in other ways.</strong></h2>
<ul> <li>
<strong><u>Do the worst thing first.</u></strong><br> You know the thing that you're dreading? The thing you've been putting off?<br> Yeah, that thing. Do that.<br> Don't think about it. Just do it.<br> Use the feel-goods from getting that done to check more things off of your to-do list.<br> </li> <li>
<strong><u>Manipulate yourself.</u></strong><br> Tell yourself you only have to do 5 minutes of an uninspiring task.<br> Don't lie. Be sincere. Do the 5 minutes.<br> Chances are, you'll be re-engaged and ready to do more.<br> Didn't work? <br> Try checking in on something that makes you angry and use that energy to fuel action.<br> </li> <li>
<u><strong>Compare yourself to others.</strong></u><br> Wait, what?! Isn't this something we should stop doing?<br> Yes and no.<br> Constantly comparing yourself to others is unhealthy,<br> especially if it fosters imposter syndrome or overachievement mindsets.<br> However, comparison can be a great motivator if used correctly.<br> Reminding yourself of your competitive colleagues and what they're achieving<br> is a great way to kickstart yourself into action when you're in an inspirational slump.</li>
</ul>
<p><em>Motivation doesn't always have to come from inspiration. </em><br>Build grit by putting one foot in front of the other and just getting it done.<br>Showing up + Doing the work = Being an everyday hero.<br> </p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and culture consultant & coach who helps leaders create cultures of joy and empowerment. </em><em><a contents="Sign up for her weekly email" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Sign up for her weekly email</a> and receive the free guide "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome."</em><br> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66541882021-06-09T08:14:30-06:002022-05-11T03:18:01-06:003 Ways to Recover from Burnout that No One's Talking About<p>Are you perpetually overwhelmed?<br>Is it challenging to get anything done?<br>Is <strong><em>doing nothing</em></strong> what you want to do most?</p>
<p>Burnout culture dictates that overwork is a badge of courage, but giving 110% isn't noble or<em> even possible</em>.<br><strong>Recovering from burnout can take months or even <em>years</em></strong>.</p>
<p>I know because I've been there.</p>
<p>After suffering burnout while getting my doctorate,<br>I started my coaching and consulting businesses.</p>
<p>I signed up for a program to help me start my new venture<br>and give me a better business mindset.</p>
<p>It ended up being 6 months of content condensed into 3 months,<br>and it broke me all over again.</p>
<p>I later found out that I potentially had an autoimmune disease playing a factor in my fatigue.</p>
<p><span class="font_large"><em>The moral of the story?</em></span></p>
<p>Burnout causes long-term damage to productivity in exchange for meeting short-term goals.<br>You <em>really do</em> have to end the burnout cycle before expecting yourself to be able to...</p>
<ul> <li>manage stress.</li> <li>problem-solve efficiently.</li> <li>meet previous expectations of yourself.</li> <li>communicate effectively. </li> <li>have any kind of work/life balance.</li>
</ul>
<p>I wasn't doing any of those well, and I had to get serious about my own burnout recovery.<br><br><em>I did the usual "get outside," "exercise," and "eat right,"<br>but quickly found out that there's so much more to it than that!</em><br> </p>
<h3><span class="font_large">3 Ways to Recover from Burnout that No One's Talking About</span></h3>
<ol> <li>
<span class="font_large"><u>Get Real.</u> </span><br> What <em>really </em>caused your burnout? What is at the core? Do a deep dive into your life, thoughts, and feelings.<br> <br> Are you blaming overwork instead of confronting something else like...<br> - a mindset that perpetuates burnout? (See my <a contents="previous blogposts" data-link-label="Blog" data-link-type="page" href="/blog" target="_blank">previous blogposts</a> about these.)<br> - personal crisis?<br> - not liking your job?<br> - an underlying health condition, mental or physical?</li> <li> <p><span class="font_large"><u>Sit with It.</u></span><br> Do that <em>nothing</em> for which your heart and mind ache.<br> Make your burnout recovery a priority.<br> Find out what <em>you </em>need personally to start finding joy in life again by listening to that voice inside.</p> </li> <li> <p><span class="font_large"><u>Communicate.</u></span><br> You need to let the people around you know how much burnout is effecting you.<br> <em>If you don't tell them, no one will, and they probably won't know.</em><br> Does the thought of that feel shameful? That's burnout culture talking, and it's up to you to fight the stigma.<br> Find the leader inside you and step up. <br> This isn't about <em>complaining. </em> It's about <em>communicating.</em><br> </p> </li>
</ol>
<p><span class="font_large">You have to find out the reason for your burnout before you can fully recover. </span><br><strong><em> </em></strong><br><em>Your burnout may not have anything to do with external factors.<br>It may have everything to do with you.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<hr><p>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and coach & consultant for leaders who want to create cultures of joy and empowerment. Sign up to receive weekly newsletters of inspiration and download the free guide, "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" <a contents="here." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here.</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66465772021-06-01T16:14:27-06:002022-07-29T03:48:20-06:00Leading during Personal Crisis<p>When I was diagnosed with Grave's disease almost 20 years ago,<br>the cure was simple: ablate (kill with radioactive iodine) the thyroid slowly<br>and replace the hormones it would normally produce with a synthetic hormone pill.</p>
<p>Only it wasn't that simple. <br><br>My thyroid stopped working suddenly instead of gradually,<br>and my body didn't absorb the synthetic pills.</p>
<p>I went from having the metabolism of a teenager to that of an 80-year old in one day.</p>
<p>It took 9 months for my body to get used to the synthetic pills,<br>and my life during that time was extremely challenging..</p>
<p>My brain and my body functioned on a range from exhausted to lethargic,<br>and I learned how important hormones are regarding mood stability.<br>I even postponed my wedding.</p>
<p><em>Did I mention I was a high-school band and choir director? Yeah, not ideal circumstances. </em></p>
<p><span class="font_regular">I made some good choices and some poor ones. </span><span class="font_large"> <br>Here are my leadership wins and losses during that time.</span></p>
<h3><u><span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular">What I Did Right</span></span></u></h3>
<ul> <li>
<strong><span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular">I talked to my boss.</span></span><em><span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular"> </span></span></em></strong><span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular">That conversation wasn't easy, but it was the best decision I made during that time and I made it early on. I didn't take time to wonder how he'd react; I just walked in and told him the facts. He listened and asked me what I needed from him.</span></span><br> </li> <li>
<span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular"><strong>I took time off.</strong> I told my principal that I was going to need to take time off, possibly without much notice, depending on how debilitating my symptoms were that day. And that's exactly what I did. It wasn't my intention to use all my available vacation days, but that's what ended up happening. </span></span><br> </li> <li><span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular"><strong>I delegated. <em> </em></strong>I agreed to an arrangement with the district to give some of my classes to a staff member wanting additional duties. I took a pay cut but kept my health insurance. I also relied on the student leaders I'd been training from the beginning of the school year.</span></span></li>
</ul>
<h3><u><span style="color:null;"><span class="font_regular">What I Did Wrong</span></span></u></h3>
<ul> <li>
<strong>I didn't tell the students. </strong>This was truly an epic fail. They could tell something wasn't right, but without knowing what was really going on, they were left to conjecture. What they came up with was worse than the truth. One student, for instance, thought I was having relationship problems. I was a very private person, and I thought that I needed to portray strength at all times. What they needed was for me to communicate my vulnerability to them in a factual, professional way instead of putting up a front.<br> </li> <li>
<b>I didn't have a great support system. </b>I had recently moved, so few people knew the quality of my character. <br> No one at work had known me before that year. I also didn't have a regular physician to manage my expectations or a therapist or coach to help me cope.<br> </li> <li>
<strong>I didn't have a mindset of empowerment. </strong>I didn't have all the tools I do now to manage my thoughts and actions. My feeling like a victim in some ways contributed to my health problems. I allowed myself to wonder why this was happening to me and what I'd done to deserve it.</li>
</ul>
<p><u><em><span class="font_regular">No one is at fault when someone is going through a difficult time, leadership included. An opportunity always rises with a challenge. </span></em></u><span class="font_regular">Getting in touch with my own humanity and vulnerability could have made me closer to my students, but I couldn't see that at the time. </span></p>
<p><em><strong>Learning and growing as a leader takes time and challenges. A good coach helps you get there faster. </strong></em></p>
<hr><p><em>Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and culture coach and consultant. Join her email list <a contents="here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here</a> and receive leadership inspiration directly to your inbox, as well as the free guide "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome." </em></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66277722021-05-11T15:01:29-06:002021-05-11T15:01:29-06:00Overwhelm Mindsets and Burnout<p>In addition to mindsets that perpetuate burnout already covered in previous blogposts,<br>mindsets that create overwhelm can also play a part.</p>
<p><strong>Helpers, creatives, and anyone who has trouble creating and enforcing boundaries<br>are all at risk for overwhelm, and potentially burnout.</strong></p>
<ul> <li>Helpers tend to put the needs of others above themselves, leaving their projects piling up in order to assist others.</li> <li>Creatives who are great innovators and problem-solvers may have trouble following through with projects after that "aha" moment of creativity, leaving projects to pile up over time.</li> <li>Those with boundary difficulties can have poor work/life balance that fuels their overwhelm.</li>
</ul>
<p><em>All of these have the same basic solution: embrace the "no."</em></p>
<p>Whether it's saying "no" to your desire to move on before finishing a project,<br>saying "no" to the colleague who will inevitably take advantage of your time,<br>or saying "no" when you are tempted to relax a boundary,</p>
<p><strong>every "no" you say is a "yes" to your own success.</strong></p>
<p>It's not selfish to value and protect your own time and resources.</p>
<p><em>Your success will increase the success of others around you.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<hr><p><a contents="Sign up" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Sign up</a> for my weekly inspiration emails (and receive a free guide to beating imposter syndrome)!</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66220862021-05-05T09:17:59-06:002021-05-05T09:17:59-06:00Proving-yourself Mindset and Burnout<p>Young adults entering the workforce are often romanticized as having something to prove,<br>to show others how hard they can work to win others' approval and move up the workforce ladder.</p>
<p>In reality, the mindset of having to prove yourself leaves you vulnerable to being taken advantage of.</p>
<p>It may get you the promotion in the short-term, but in the long-term,<br><em>proving yourself mindset often ends up in burnout.</em></p>
<p><em><strong>This mindset reveals some level of insecurity in yourself<br>that makes you want the approval of others to increase your self-esteem.</strong></em></p>
<p>Those around you will subconsciously (or consciously) abuse your time<br>because you are sending them the message to give you more opportunities to prove yourself,<br>which results in more opportunities to feel good about yourself.</p>
<p>Even in cases in which clients are trying to prove their worth to themselves,<br>as opposed to proving their worth to others,<br>they are still on track for burnout.</p>
<p>Some may tell themselves, "I'm new in this position, so I have to make sure I prove myself,<br>but after everyone believes in me, I can relax a bit."</p>
<p>But that relaxing never comes because this mindset feeds off of that inner need for approval.<br><br><em>Proving-yourself mindset is unsustainable in the long-term.<br>Not only can it result in burnout, but it can lead to resentment resulting from continually<br>inviting and allowing others to take advantage of you.</em></p>
<p>Do good work for the sake of doing good work. Have a life outside of work that sustains your self-esteem.</p>
<p><em><strong>You don't have to prove anything to anyone.</strong></em></p>
<hr><p><span style="font-size: 12.8px;">Have blogpost links send directly to your email inbox and receive the free guide "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" <a contents="here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here</a>.</span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66152312021-04-27T11:58:31-06:002023-12-10T11:05:11-07:00Work-harder Mindset and Burnout<p><u><span class="font_regular">Part 4 in the Mindsets that Perpetuate Burnout blog series</span></u></p>
<p>You should be proud of a healthy work ethic, an enjoyment and fulfillment of purpose when you work,<br>and allow yourself to take joy in your accomplishments. </p>
<p><strong><em>A work-harder mindset takes a good work ethic too far, though. </em></strong><br>It may look like...</p>
<ul> <li>Thinking you have to be the hardest worker in the room to earn others' (and maybe your own) respect.</li> <li>Looking down on those who don't look like they are working hard.</li>
</ul>
<p><strong><em>Instead, working smarter means being strategic and innovating more efficient and effective ways to do things.</em></strong><br>It may look like...</p>
<ul> <li>Recognizing what you need to get into a work flow state.</li> <li>Creatively problem solving instead of using your usual go-to solutions.</li>
</ul>
<p><strong>This results in working with more ease, but it may look like working less on the surface.</strong></p>
<p>If you think working harder proves that you have a great work ethic,<br>you may not only be missing out on ways to improve how you work,<br>but also creating a burnout cycle for yourself.</p>
<p>Working smarter takes more brain bandwidth,<br>which is in short supply during a pandemic because of all the background processing our brains are doing.</p>
<p>If you want to get more done and do it better,<br><em>you may just need time off or radical self care to give your brain the time and space it needs<br>to create solutions that allow you to work smarter.</em></p>
<p>If you think you need to work hard all the time,<br>you may be creating the perfect storm for your own and your team's burnout.</p>
<hr><p><span class="font_small">Dr. Nancy Williams is a musician, educator, and culture consultant/coach who helps leaders create cultures of joy and empowerment. <br>To receive inspiration directly to your email inbox, sign up for her weekly newsletter and receive the free guide "3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" <a contents="here." data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">here.</a></span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66092292021-04-20T09:26:17-06:002022-09-26T15:45:31-06:00FOMO and Burnout<p>Mindsets that Contribute to Burnout, part 3</p>
<p>Overworking is clearly a contributor to burnout culture, but why we overwork is complex and personal.<br>For some, the fear of missing out (FOMO) allows others to take advantage of them in the workplace.</p>
<p>For instance, I had a client who wouldn't say no to her boss,<br>no matter the banality of the task<br>or the amount of work she already had to do.</p>
<p>She wanted to be the one her boss thought of first,<br>so that when a great assignment came up,<br>one that would further her career,<br>she'd get the offer before anyone else.</p>
<p>That great assignment had never come up, however;<br>and my client was left perpetually overworked and burnt out.</p>
<p>FOMO in the workplace can be perceived by others<br>as you needing to please or not knowing your worth,<br>which in turn sends the message that you don't value yourself.</p>
<p>Not realizing your own value<br>invites others to take advantage of you.</p>
<p>Realizing your value and acknowledging your worth<br>are the first steps to overcoming FOMO.</p>
<p>The universe has a way of holding back the things you think you need<br>until you realize the things you already have.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><a contents="Click here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">Click here</a> to have blogposts sent directly to your inbox and receive<br>my free guide on imposter syndrome!</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/66038662021-04-14T10:06:26-06:002021-06-26T19:40:54-06:00Perfectionist Mindset and Burnout<h4><span class="font_regular">Mindsets that Perpetuate Burnout, Part 2</span></h4>
<p><span class="font_regular">Perfectionism plays a significant part in burnout culture.<br>They both can be seen as badges of honor<br>in a work-harder world.</span></p>
<p><em><span class="font_regular">It's no secret that perfectionism is respected at some level.</span></em></p>
<p><span class="font_regular">How often to interviewees list that as a negative quality<br>with the presumption that it's not really that bad<br>and that their employer may well see it as a positive quality instead?</span></p>
<p><span class="font_regular">After all, the perfectionist does good work<br>by paying attention to detail and<br>working long hours<br>without needing external motivation.<br>They are often internally driven to succeed.</span></p>
<p><em><span class="font_regular">When taking a closer look at perfection however,<br>the negatives outweigh the positives,<br>especially if the perfectionist is in a leadership position.</span></em></p>
<h3><span class="font_regular">The perfectionist mindset has significant flaws, such as...</span></h3>
<ul> <li><span class="font_regular">perfection is attainable by humans</span></li> <li><span class="font_regular">there is only one way to do something right</span></li> <li><span class="font_regular">perfection is a desirable outcome</span></li> <li><span class="font_regular">perfectionism is a priority</span></li>
</ul>
<p><span class="font_regular">These beliefs set the perfectionist and their team up for burnout<br>by creating an environment in which</span><br>nothing is ever enough.</p>
<h3>How does this hurt a perfectionist's team?</h3>
<ul> <li>poor work/life balance is modeled</li> <li>goals are often unrealistic or unachievable</li> <li>humanity is not valued and empathy is not given</li> <li>micromanaging is common</li>
</ul>
<p>Individually, any of these will contribute to burnout,<br>but taken together,<br>it is a dangerous cocktail of burnout culture.</p>
<p>Perfectionism is not an attribute of which to be proud.<br><br>It is detrimental to the well-being, productivity, and culture of any organization,<br>and will ultimately cost you your best employees.</p>
<p><br>Would you like someone to talk to about burnout in your life?<br><a contents="Discovery calls" data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://calendly.com/drnancywilliams/discovery-call" target="_blank">Discovery calls</a> during the month of April are all about<br>listening and empathy in a no-sales and no-marketing zone!</p>
<p> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65968882021-04-07T09:43:25-06:002023-12-10T10:08:55-07:00Mindsets that Perpetuate Burnout Culture, Part 1<h2>Work Identity Mindset</h2>
<p>Work identity mindset is present when you value your work identity over all else.<br><br>Work always comes first,<br>and your work identity is the main way<br>in which you see your value to the world.</p>
<p>When too much of your identity is dependent on your success at work, <br>you are setting yourself (and your team) up for burnout.</p>
<p>Your unhealthy drive for your own success can mean</p>
<ul> <li>working longer hours</li> <li>denying yourself breaks</li> <li>constantly thinking about work, even when you are not working.</li> <li>increased stress levels</li> <li>burnout and other mental health issues</li> <li>problems at home</li>
</ul>
<p> </p>
<p>Ultimately, what you expect of yourself,<br>you expect of others.</p>
<p>A work identity mindset can effect your leadership by...</p>
<ul> <li>having unrealistic expectations of others</li> <li>fostering burnout</li> <li>denying your team the downtime they need</li> <li>increasing attrition rates</li> <li>losing your best employees</li> <li>creating low morale</li> <li>lowering productivity</li> <li>crippling innovation and creativity</li>
</ul>
<p>A balanced work/life mindset values your identity as a person <br>and takes into account all of the relationships in your life, <br>including your relationship with yourself <br>and your team.</p>
<p>If you'd like to explore your relationship to work identity mindset,<br>schedule a complimentary discovery session <a contents="here." data-link-label="" data-link-type="url" href="https://calendly.com/drnancywilliams/discovery-call">here.</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65900302021-03-31T09:00:42-06:002023-12-10T09:56:51-07:004 Ways to Respond to Burnout<p>Leadership must continue to make burnout prevention and mitigation a priority.<br>It is not employees’ responsibility alone to protect themselves.<br>The long-term effects of burnout culture hurt them, the business, and the economy<br>in lost productivity and innovation more than the temporary short-term benefits. </p>
<h3>In addition to providing mental health support and more time off,<br>here are 4 things that help mitigate the damage of burnout. </h3>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Communication</strong> - Check in with your individual team members regularly,<br> not just in team meetings but in a private setting. <br> <br> Relay any actionable items in an email, even if you’ve already discussed them. </li>
</ul>
<p> Brains are not able to absorb as much or as quickly when they are burnt out. <br> <em> Don’t have the same expectations of consistency of comprehension as you did pre-burnout. </em></p>
<ul> <li>
<strong>Flexibility</strong> - Giving people choices and autonomy is especially important in times of stress.<br> <em>They've been hired to do a job; allow them to decide when and how best to do it.</em><br> <br> Freedom is the opposite of burnout. <br> </li> <li>
<strong>Protection</strong> - Notice who always say yes. <br> Notice who you are most likely to have do extra work. <br> Notice who is the most innovative thinker. <br> <br> Your most dependable, hardworking, and creative team members need you to recognize<br> when they’ve been given more than they can handle, especially when they don’t speak up. <br> <em>It's your job to protect them.</em><br> </li> <li>
<strong>Modeling</strong> - You can’t expect your team to prioritize burnout recovery if you aren’t doing it yourself. <br> When it comes to taking days off, practicing radical self-care, setting and keeping boundaries,<br> and having work/life balance, are you setting the example you want them to follow? <br> <br> <em>Actions have always spoken louder than words.</em>
</li>
</ul>
<p>The events of 2020 and 2021 have had a significant effect on mental health <br>and have exposed burnout culture for what it is,<br>a significant long-term drain on emotional and physical well-being.<br><br>Manage expectations and realize that it will take awhile to recover.<br>Leadership must exercise extreme empathy in the meantime.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>P.S. Do you suffer from imposter syndrome? Get my free guide "<a contents="3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome</a>."</em></p>
<p> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65834832021-03-24T10:10:07-06:002021-03-26T11:07:42-06:00A Cure for Anxiety?<p>Are you experiencing anxiety?</p>
<p>You are not alone.</p>
<p>Anxiety is plaguing the workplace and perhaps the world right now. <br>The pandemic introduced so many unknowns that it’s hard to stay present. <br>Since anxiety comes from focusing on the future and its uncertainties,<br>it makes sense that we are all more anxious right now. </p>
<p>I often use opposites with my clients to help understand a particular emotion or malady. <br>For example, if you are finding yourself irritated by a colleague,<br>focusing on that colleague’s good qualities will be a way to break that cycle of irritation. </p>
<p>Until recently, I had been using self-love as the opposite of anxiety. <br>It works. <br>My clients experience good results.<br><br>What happened to change my mind? <br>I was just turning off the morning news<br>when I heard guest psychologists discussing anxiety.</p>
<p>They offered kindness as the anecdote to anxiety. </p>
<p>As I thought about it, I realized that self-love is a kind of kindness to oneself,<br>so it makes sense that that would be working for my clients. </p>
<p>Could kindness to others calm anxiety as well? </p>
<p>I decided to focus on kindness towards others for a week and see what happened<br>because, like you, I'm experiencing heightened anxiety right now as well. </p>
<p>I was duly impressed. Most definitely, my anxiety had decreased. </p>
<p>Additionally, my energy levels were higher, as was my mood. <br>I was getting more work done and it was fun! </p>
<p>Maybe it's not a cure, but it was good medicine for sure.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Suffering from imposter syndrome? <br>Download my free guide <a contents="here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe">here</a> while subscribing to my emails,<br>a weekly story of inspiration delivered directly to your inbox.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65637802021-03-03T09:34:30-07:002021-10-29T23:43:23-06:004 Steps to Manage Professional Disappointment<p>Disappointment comes in many forms, and anyone who has attempted to achieve something has experienced it. <br>When that disappointment is a big one, when it’s something you had your heart set on and had convinced yourself<br>of its necessity to your success, it can feel devastating. </p>
<h3>Here are four chronological steps to help you come to terms with it and move on,<br>instead of letting it set you back. </h3>
<h4><em><strong><span class="font_regular">1. Allow yourself time to grieve. </span></strong></em></h4>
<p>If you had your heart set on it, you most likely perceive it as a loss. The emotions you are feeling are related to grief. <br>There’s only one way to manage it, and that’s by going through it. Give yourself some time and space to allow yourself to feel whatever you need to feel, then allow them to fade away. </p>
<h4><em><strong>2. Determine what you can learn from the experience. </strong></em></h4>
<p>Emotions and logic can’t occupy the same space at the same time. Only after the strength of your emotions has diminished<br>can you begin to think clearly. You can then identify things that may have changed the disappointing outcome. Try to detach yourself from the outcome and notice anything during the process that didn’t feel right or anything that was not strategically beneficial. Learning from your disappointment will help you to find a sense of purpose in the journey and make it easier to continue to take risks. </p>
<h4><em><strong>3. Forgive. </strong></em></h4>
<p>You are only human. All the other people around you are only human, too. Mistakes happen, even if you’d prefer not to admit it to yourself. If you catch yourself blaming others or if you hold on to feelings of regret, you get stuck in time and don’t allow yourself or others to evolve. The first step forward is being able to forgive yourself. Forgiving others in your professional life does not imply forgetting the experience or not learning from it; it just means letting go of the burden of carrying things that will weigh you (and your career) down. </p>
<h4><em><strong>4. Let go but stay in touch. </strong></em></h4>
<p>Finally, let go of thinking things could be any different or that you have missed out. Trust that you will have another opportunity in the future that will be meant for you in ways this one was not. If you’re overly concerned with a past disappointment, you may miss seeing that next opportunity and be incapable of embracing it. Don’t alienate those who were part of your story. Be brave enough to keep in touch with them and others and continue to put yourself out there. </p>
<p>There’s no shame in being disappointed. It’s part of the human condition and it helps us to develop empathy for one another. </p>
<p>Do you need help fighting imposter syndrome? Get my free guide<a contents=" here" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank"> here</a>.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65568392021-02-23T16:07:33-07:002022-01-08T04:17:24-07:003 Types of Confidence that Contribute to Success<p>The lack of confidence seems to be at epidemic proportions lately. </p>
<p>I talk to people daily who struggle with imposter syndrome or <br>who don’t feel deserving enough for their dream life or career. </p>
<p>We see a lot of supposed confidence around us, but is it real? </p>
<p>The generations who have grown up with the internet have learned to marketing themselves well. <br>Often though, the confidence portrayed online doesn’t align with what’s going on internally. <br>For example, suicide rates have spiked since social media has been accessible by phone. </p>
<p>Older generations may feel it difficult to keep up with this visual portrayal of confidence,<br>(even though they may have more skills and experience)<br>making them feel like they can’t compete with the grandiose claims of their younger counterparts. </p>
<p>The lack of confidence among all generations seems to be a unifying complaint. </p>
<h3>I’ve isolated three main types of confidence that contribute to success. </h3>
<ul> <li> <h4>Believing in Who You Are</h4> </li>
</ul>
<p>No matter what your job is, you have value and purpose. Just being you is enough for you to be loved and understood. Living a full life is more important than your job. At the end of life, do you think you'll have wished you'd worked more? Your job does not define who you are as a human being. You’re more than that. </p>
<p>I had to learn this lesson the hard way when health issues sidelined my career for years. <em>Accepting that I was good enough, even when I couldn’t work, is one of my greatest life achievements. </em></p>
<ul> <li> <h4>Believing in What You Can Do</h4> </li>
</ul>
<p>Awareness of your strengths and weaknesses is critical to developing authentic confidence, but confidence ultimately starts with doing. It’s through the accumulation of successes and failures that we learn and grow and build confidence. If you’re not gaining confidence as you gain more experience, ask yourself why. Are you not challenging yourself? Do you hold onto your failures? Do you define your achievements through legitimate, productive feedback or do you give haters too much credit? </p>
<p>When pivoting my career from music education to culture consultant and coach, I had to acknowledge, celebrate, and embrace the nonmusical skills I’d built throughout my career. Taking stock of these skills was a powerful way to combat the unhealthy areas of my competitive streak as a musician. </p>
<ul> <li> <h4>Believing that You Can Adapt</h4> </li>
</ul>
<p>Committees hire people who are confident they can do the job, even if they have less experience than their counterparts. Having confidence that you can learn and adapt comes from experience in learning and adapting. Often, we may be afraid to fail to the point that we don’t try. Pushing ourselves can be uncomfortable, but that’s how we grow. Realizing that we can self-correct when we make a mistake also contributes to this type of confidence. </p>
<p>I remember confidently accepting my first Dixieland gig without any Dixieland performance experience, but I had years of general jazz experience and I knew how to listen critically to recordings. My risk paid off, and I soon became known as one of the best regional Dixieland performers. My confidence came from my belief in my ability to learn and adapt, but it was also founded in the recognition of my jazz and listening skills. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>We all have lapses in confidence, but when your confidence is authentic,<br>seasoned by experience and backed by certain beliefs,<br>these lapses are fewer and further between. </p>
<p>Realizing that we need all three kinds of confidence to get there will help you recognize which areas need your attention and work. </p>
<p>If you suffer from imposter syndrome, get my free guide, “3 Ways to Beat Imposter Syndrome and Let Yourself Shine!” here: <a contents="https://drnancywilliams.com/subscribe" data-link-label="Subscribe" data-link-type="page" href="/subscribe" target="_blank">https://drnancywilliams.com/subscribe</a></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65494242021-02-16T17:00:00-07:002021-02-16T17:00:03-07:00Guilt-free Firing<p>“Firing that person was the best thing I did for our office culture.” </p>
<p>“I’ve had people I’ve had to let go come back and thank me.” </p>
<p>These are some of the things I’ve heard from managers. </p>
<p>Have you ever known that someone needed to be fired, but waited to do so because <br> you were afraid you were wrong, <br> you thought you’d be perceived as mean, <br> or you just felt too guilty? </p>
<p>It’s time to separate yourself from the negative emotional responsibility of letting someone go, <br>and realize the positive consequences of firing someone <br>*for everyone involved.* </p>
<p>Firing someone doesn’t need to be the worst part of your day. </p>
<p>It can be a tool of empowerment, education, and kindness. </p>
<p><em>That’s right...kindness. </em></p>
<p>At its core, firing someone is like breaking off a romantic relationship. <br>When you know it’s over, but you continue to lead them on, you do them a disservice. <br>It’s far better to break it off and give them to opportunity to find someone who is a better fit, <br>someone who will make them happy in ways you can’t. </p>
<p>This is oversimplified, but it illuminates the disservice we do as leaders <br>when employees who need to be let go are kept on too long out of our feelings of responsibility or guilt. </p>
<p>Not only does being fired empower that employee to find a better fit <br>at another company or even within another career, <br><em>it sends the following important feedback to the rest of the workforce: </em></p>
<p> culture is important, </p>
<p> employees are valued, </p>
<p> expectations will not be compromised, </p>
<p> and actions have consequences. </p>
<p><strong>Culture </strong></p>
<p> A good culture is hard to build and must be protected once you have it. <br> If someone is unaligned with the business mission, vision, or culture, they will negatively affect the culture. </p>
<p><strong>Value</strong> </p>
<p> Most likely, other employees are having to do more work to compensate for an employee who needs to be let go. <br> Show your employees that you value their time and energy by hiring someone that will be a better fit. </p>
<p><strong>Expectations </strong></p>
<p> Firing those who don’t meet your expectations of professional behavior, deadline adherence, or work quality/quantity <br> lets others know that those things are truly important to you. </p>
<p> People like to have clear expectations, so tell them and show them. </p>
<p><strong>Consequences </strong></p>
<p> Consistenty enforcing your boundaries and creating consequences for grievous actions<br> allows employees to feel comfortable with your expectations. <br> No, it's not better to "keep people on their toes" with mixed messages. It's stressful.</p>
<p> You must teach people how to treat you. </p>
<p>Firing, when done with respect and careful consideration, is one of the most empowering tools a leader can have <br>because of these positive results. </p>
<p>To keep someone employed out of a sense of guilt or insecurity only cheats that person, <br>as well as your other employees and the business. </p>
<p>You can’t attract what you need if you’re holding onto something you don’t. </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65404742021-02-05T09:41:09-07:002021-02-05T09:41:09-07:004 Tips to Get Better Customer Service<p>You’ve been charged the wrong amount. <br>You didn’t receive the product or it’s damaged. <br>Your payment didn’t go through or wasn’t recorded. <br>You didn’t receive the right kind or amount of product. <br>The product/service wasn’t what you thought it would be. </p>
<p>Something’s gone wrong, and things aren’t what you expected them to be. </p>
<p>We’ve all been there. </p>
<p>What can you do to get the results you need in a timely manner? </p>
<p>Customer service should be all about relationships, but automation has replaced much of that in recent decades, <br>making sure you can’t make those personal connections. </p>
<h3>
<span style="color:null;"><strong>Here are 4 tips take to personalize the experience</strong></span>, and get better and faster customer service from vendors. </h3>
<h4><em>Be calm and professional but persistent. </em></h4>
<p>“The squeaky wheel gets oiled.” -<br>Your problem will most likely be more of a priority to your than to them. <br>Keep contacting customer service if the problem is not rectified to your liking. </p>
<p>“You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.” - <br>People like to help others who are polite and calm more than someone who is angry or condescending. </p>
<p> Threats and poor behavior on your part may get this problem fixed, but what will that cost you in character, reputation, and connections? </p>
<h4><em>Lead with solutions. </em></h4>
<p>Decide ahead of time what you need to be satisfied and state this clearly. </p>
<p>Not sure what the solution needs to be? <br>Use inclusive language (How do *we* remedy this?) to help them help you. </p>
<p>Don’t blame. It may be tempting to blame others, but this rarely helps your case. </p>
<p>Don’t take rejection personally. <br>Someone may be projecting their bad day onto you. <br>Keep an even temperament to problem solve. </p>
<h4>
<em>Try to get personalized service.</em> It’s all about humanizing the process. </h4>
<p>Tell your story to personalize you. <br>Let them know how this has affected you or your business. </p>
<p>Ask for a manager if you feel you’re not being heard or treated fairly. </p>
<p>Request a phone call or zoom vs. email if the situation persists. </p>
<p>Ask for an account specialist for your business if you don’t have one already. </p>
<h4><em>Manage your expectations.</em></h4>
<p>Not every vendor is going to be up to your standards, but your standards can’t be perfection. <br>Everyone will make a mistake at some point. <br><em>It's more important to notice what is done to rectify that mistake than to escalate the mistake.</em></p>
<p>You are not a victim.<br>You get to decide if that is good enough for you to keep doing business with them or to find someone else.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>These steps will make getting better customer service less tedious, and as you find and nurture connections, it may almost be enjoyable. </p>
<p>Remember that everyone you talk to is someone’s loved one. </p>
<p>How would you want someone else to treat a loved one of yours?</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65343242021-01-29T13:54:50-07:002021-01-29T14:02:15-07:00How to Lead an Established Team<p>My clients who already work in great teams get nervous when new leadership is being hired. </p>
<p>It’s not because they’re afraid of change. <br>It’s not because they’re inflexible. <br>It’s not because they’re worried if they will be liked. </p>
<h4><strong>They are nervous that the new hire is going to break what’s already great. </strong></h4>
<p>Often when new leadership arrives, they are determined to make their mark and prove their worth. </p>
<p>The team may be forced to - </p>
<p> read about the latest trends in communication, <br> go to unnecessary meetings, <br> and participate in redundant team-building exercises. </p>
<p>That’s not saying that there is no worth in those things,<em> except that </em>that may not be what they need. </p>
<h4><strong>If you are hired to lead an already established team, <br>it’s most important that you do these things first: </strong></h4>
<ul> <li> <h4><em>Observe. </em></h4> </li> <li> <h4><em>Ask questions. </em></h4> </li> <li> <h4><em>Listen. </em></h4> </li>
</ul>
<p>Most of the time, you’ll only need to get out of the way until you can clearly identify areas that need improvement or your assistance. </p>
<p><em>If not, you will likely be a burden on their time, energy, and productivity. </em></p>
<h4><em><strong>Don’t fix what’s not broken.</strong></em></h4>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65286292021-01-23T10:23:42-07:002021-01-29T13:47:49-07:004 Leadership Characteristics that Redefine Strength<p>How do you define strong leadership? </p>
<p><span class="font_large">These 4 characteristics may redefine what you may traditionally think of as strengths. </span></p>
<p>So often we connect strength to physical capabilities, like muscles and power. <br>These can predispose us to correlating strength in leadership to a similar sense of power and aggression. </p>
<p><em>The real building blocks of leadership are based in humanity. <br>They motivate others through inspiration instead of fear. </em></p>
<h3>1. Empathy is what employees want most out of leadership. </h3>
<p>Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, to imagine what it is to be like them and to feel for their situation, as they perceive it. You will have to let go of your own perspective to embrace another one, and this requires letting go of ego. </p>
<h3>2. Listening is the key component of communication. </h3>
<p>Only when others feel understood will they be open to your voice. Only when the source of a problem is understood can it be truly solved. Listen without judgment and listen before you speak. </p>
<h3>3. Humility connects us to our humanity. </h3>
<p>It is a rope to empathy. If you have never been humbled, you have never allowed yourself to believe that you make mistakes. Humility is what allows us to take in feedback, which in turn creates awareness and growth. </p>
<h3>4. Courtesy is the language of respect. </h3>
<p>If you wish to be respected as a leader, you must respect others. Paying attention to your manners tells others that you agree to behave in a certain way in public because you value your shared space.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/65007882020-12-16T10:15:21-07:002022-05-19T05:14:38-06:004 Areas in which to Set Boundaries<p>Now more than ever, when overwhelm and mental exhaustion are commonplace, we need to get better at setting boundaries. </p>
<p>But where and how? </p>
<p>Here are four areas that often need boundaries or boundary-improvement. Doing so will increase your authority and model self-care to others. </p>
<h3>Time </h3>
<p>Create finite starting and ending times for meetings and work conversations. Schedule a non-negotiable afterwards if you have longwinded colleagues. </p>
<p><em>Your time is valuable, but you need to value it as well as teach others to do the same</em>. </p>
<p>Conversely, pay others the same respect by being organized for meetings and keeping them on track so that you can reasonably stay within your time constraints. </p>
<h3>Energy </h3>
<p>Carve out non-negotiable time for self-care, be it exercise, meditation, journaling, or savoring a cup of fabulous coffee. Figure out the one thing you need every day to be your best. Do it the same time every day, so people get used to not being able to interrupt you. </p>
<p><em>Keep it sacred and protect it diligently.</em> This will save you time and energy in the long run. </p>
<h3>Privacy </h3>
<p>Decide the level of privacy you need to be comfortable. Be okay with saying, "I'm not comfortable with that," or "I value my privacy."</p>
<p><em>Authenticity and vulnerability can co-exist with privacy. </em></p>
<p>Some people need more work/life separation than others. Privacy levels can also change or evolve with time. When people understand your limits, they will be more comfortable knowing that your need for privacy is simply a personal choice and has nothing to do with them. </p>
<h3>Duties </h3>
<p>Don’t take on others’ tasks before completing your own, emergencies excluded. Keep a running tally of all your duties and make sure your superiors are aware of all of them. Let them know if it's too much before it’s too late. </p>
<p>More than once, <em>an overachiever has resigned exhausted, only to be replaced by two people instead of one. </em></p>
<p>Bosses can’t read your mind and neither can employees or team members. Communicate your needs and delegate when appropriate. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Learning to set boundaries and stick to them protects you from overwhelm, exhaustion, and burnout, but it's up to you and you alone to do it. When people see that you're serious about valuing yourself, they won't be as likely to cross those boundaries and will respect your authority even more.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64952252020-12-09T08:47:24-07:002020-12-09T09:25:03-07:00Speaking and Listening - Know Your Responsibilities<p>With tempers running short due to current societal conditions including the pandemic, reduced hours and pay, and long-term remote working, poor communication is inevitable. When one person gets frustrated, emotions can take over. Emotions trump brainpower every time. That’s when it’s time to defuse and walk it back, or maybe even reschedule. </p>
<p>Keeping communication congenial helps brains work better. Many communication problems can be eliminated with a few ground rules. Here are lists of responsibilities for each party that will help keep communication problems from occurring and remedy them when they do. </p>
<h3>Responsibilities of the Listener </h3>
<ul> <li>Create an interruption-free space. </li> <li>Shut down electronic distractions. </li> <li>Don’t try to multitask. (More and more studies show that multitasking does not work anyway!) Give the speaker your full attention. </li> <li>Create a few minutes ahead of time to calm yourself through deep breathing or meditation if you are having trouble focusing. </li> <li>Ask questions immediately if you don’t understand something. </li> <li>Relay the information back in your own words to check comprehension. </li>
</ul>
<h3>Responsibilities of the Speaker </h3>
<ul> <li>Relay information calmly. </li> <li>Create an atmosphere in which the listener can interrupt you if needed without offending you. (When people are creating connections in their brain, they may need certain information at a certain time. Communicators may unintentionally skip over necessary data because it is something understood so well by them, but not necessarily by the listener.) </li> <li>Take responsibility for making yourself understood. </li> <li>Add a visual aid. The majority of people are primarily visual learners.</li> <li>Try to figure out what concept or data the listener is missing. It's not their job to understand how your brain works; it’s your responsibility to be clear and to uncover how your communication is lacking. </li>
</ul>
<p>When I was a young teacher, a piece of advice I received proved to be critical in my own leadership journey. That was to<em> take responsibility for what’s not working instead of blaming others</em>. If you are constantly frustrated that others don’t understand you, you may have a communication problem, not them.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64900812020-12-02T10:15:15-07:002022-01-02T08:08:39-07:005 Strategies to Effectively Communicate Instructions Through Email<p>Businesses often accentuate succinctness in communications. This is understandable. No one wants to read a rambling message with unnecessary content. However, efforts to appeal to today’s short attention spans and incorporate time-saving strategies often have the side effect of leaving out necessary information. This results in misunderstandings, with tasks completed incorrectly or ineffectually. </p>
<h3>1. Include context. </h3>
<p>“You don’t know what you don’t know.” The corollary of this adage is, “you don’t know what other people don’t know.” Make sure the context of your communication is there; some people need that overall comprehension of how their duties contribute to the big picture. When contextual understanding is not present, people don’t know the questions to ask. They don’t realize they need those answers. </p>
<h3>2. Incorporate an introduction, content, and conclusion.</h3>
<p>Visually construct an email that is easy to read in chunks. The introduction serves to tell people of the problem at hand and include context. If you’ve already had a conversation, remind them of that here as well. If the content can be done in list form, do so, and use bullet points. Make sure the sequence of instruction is logical. Use the conclusion to reiterate your main points, objectives, or deadlines. </p>
<h3>3. Check pronouns and subjects. </h3>
<p>Are they all there? Make sure you have identified the subject before referring to it with a pronoun. Will the reader know what “it” is? Additionally, the understood “you” does not apply to “I.” For example, “take care of x” has an understood you at the beginning, “need to give you x” does not have an understood I. </p>
<h3>4. Identify possessives, prepositions, or prepositional phrases you could add or change. </h3>
<p>I blame texting for the recent tendencies to be careless here. These items can be difficult to identify since they often include information you already know, but that may be unclear to others. A good exercise is to reread it with fresh eyes, pretending to be the intended reader. I read an example of this yesterday in a social media post. The writer wrote that eating bananas and whole grains were exactly what *not* to do every day. They left out “if you are on a keto diet,” so I was thoroughly confused. </p>
<h3>5. Include a sincere call to action. </h3>
<p>Invite the reader to ask you questions and tell them the best way to get ahold of you. Check your tone. If you aren’t sincere, people may not take you up on it. You are creating a mini culture in your email. Make it a culture that is a safe place to ask for help. You don’t want people thinking they maybe understand the right thing to do, but they don’t check because they don’t want to look stupid. You want people to fully and confidently understand the task at hand.</p>
<p>You don't have to spend a lot of extra time on each email. Make the intention to start thinking from the reader's point of view. Start practicing the above strategies and improvement will happen in time. Notice the types of questions people ask and see if there's a way you could've communicated that would've made that question null.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64804232020-11-18T09:33:57-07:002020-11-18T09:33:57-07:005 Dos and Don'ts for Leadership during Difficult Times<p>Some leadership strategies are particularly important during extreme hardship. The following 5 dos and don’ts apply to leadership in general, but they are especially important right now. Soft skills can be harder than anticipated when you yourself are struggling, and you may be asking more than your employees can give if you aren’t checking yourself. These 5 strategies will help. </p>
<h4>1. DO provide step-by-step instruction. DON’T content dump. </h4>
<p>Mental exhaustion is a legitimate concern this far into the pandemic. Brains learn better when content is divided into chunks. Don’t assume people will learn if you give them the resources. That may mentally exhaust them. Instead, reiterate strong points and introduce new material in small doses. </p>
<h4>2. DO focus on a long-term vision of success. DON’T adhere to unrealistic goals. </h4>
<p>Anxiety and overwhelm are running high. While chunking goals into smaller bits may have worked earlier this year, goalsetting may not be working at all for some now. Reevaluate pre-pandemic goals and adjust, since those may be unrealistic in the present climate. Unrealistic goals will only contribute to anxiety and overwhelm and decrease productivity. </p>
<h4>3. DO let feelings come and go. DON’T try to control feelings or assign value judgments. </h4>
<p>Trying to control or feelings or numb yourself to them will only cause more distress later. Grief is real and tangible in the workforce. Respect it in yourself and others. </p>
<h4>4. DO practice gratitude. DON’T practice extreme tone-deaf positivity. </h4>
<p>Gratitude yes! Toxic positivity no. Positivity to the extreme is dismissive to those who are struggling. It’s also tone-deaf to the state of current affairs. Be sensitive. Be kind. Be grateful instead. </p>
<p>5. DO listen and empathize. DON’T judge. </p>
<p>Even in good times, empathy is what the best employees want most in leadership. Check your judgments and be compassionate and understanding instead. If you feel like you don’t have any answers or won’t be able to help, that’s ok. Listening is a powerful tool.</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64734672020-11-09T10:52:16-07:002021-06-17T00:54:49-06:00The One Thing that Changed My Business Mindset about 2020<p>Shhh - don't tell. I'm ditching my goals right now. </p>
<p>Normally, my goals are a fun challenge, a game with myself in which I always win, even if I don't achieve them fully. Just the act of making them and reaching *for* them gets me closer to my long-term vision </p>
<p>Since the pandemic hit, I've been telling others to break their goals into smaller, more immediately time-sensitive chunks (and I’ve been doing that myself). As 2020 has progressed, stress has been added upon stress, and I started seeing more anxiety within and around me. My business goals weren't fun anymore. I was associating them with stress and pressure. </p>
<p>To be honest, I had based them on an outdated culture, a system of expectations that is constantly being skewed by current events and an unsympathetic virus. Life and business have changed so much in the last few months, even weeks, that chunking my goals into smaller bits isn't working anymore. </p>
<p>I decided to do something radical! </p>
<p>I ditched my 2020 goals, large and small, completely, in lieu of connecting more directly with my long-term vision. It worked! I'm more productive and less stressed. Reconnecting with my overall vision has gotten me excited about my business again. I'm still moving forward, and in the right direction. </p>
<p>These unprecedented times call for unprecedented actions. Maybe a lot of what we've been practicing that yielded great results previously doesn't work as well right now. </p>
<p>I challenge you to challenge your habits and tweak (or take an extended break from) them! Notice what’s working and what’s not and adapt through experimentation. </p>
<p>Contact me if you’d like to hear more about how you can start not just thinking but living outside the box! </p>
<p>https://drnancywilliams.com/culture-consultant-coach</p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64555022020-10-14T11:27:42-06:002021-09-05T12:20:57-06:003 Strategies to Consider before Implementing Dress Codes<p><span class="font_large">I just read an article about how businesses considering mandating dress codes for remote workers, and my head almost exploded. Here’s why… </span></p>
<p>Studies are showing that remote workers who are dressing down for work are showing dramatic decreases in productivity. Management’s answer? Mandate dress codes. </p>
<p>This is indicative of the type of culture that causes high attrition rates;<u> this us-vs.-them philosophy is costing businesses their best people.</u></p>
<p>Some people are as productive or even more so working from home than on site, no matter what they’re wearing. A dictatorial approach to dress is not going to help that segment of the workforce. </p>
<p><em>Worse, it may even *alienate* them. </em></p>
<p><span class="font_large">If not that, what? How do you increase productivity in those people who are suffering? </span></p>
<p><strong>#1. Investigate. </strong></p>
<p>Determine if dress is a cause-effect issue or if it’s a symptom of a larger concern. There’s a lot going on in the world right now (unprecedented stressors!) and depression rates are high. </p>
<p>Are the PJs employees are wearing to web meetings causing lower productivity or are employees who are suffering from mild depression choosing to wear PJs? </p>
<p><strong>#2. Think small. </strong></p>
<p>Instead of corporation-wide mandates, have your team leaders and middle management determine what’s right for their sector. The needs of the IT department are most likely different than customer service team needs because dramatically different personality types tend to fill those jobs. Ideally, team leaders should be making these decisions with individuals. A one-size-fits-all mandate is a disservice to the diversity of your employees. </p>
<p><strong>#3. Adopt a service mindset. </strong></p>
<p>How can you help struggling employees on a deeper level than wardrobe? How much mental health support does your company provide? How is your culture supporting them? Respect your employees. Help them discover what works best for them. </p>
<p>An intentionally created culture makes this process so much easier. </p>
<p><em>Culture-based decisions are also more effective than decisions based solely on data. </em></p>
<p><span class="font_large">Culture matters in uncertain times more than ever!</span></p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64342402020-09-15T12:45:27-06:002022-03-17T02:35:30-06:00Divisive Politics and Workplace Culture<p>I posted a baby goat video on my personal FB page. </p>
<p>An acquaintance who is on the opposite end of the political spectrum commented, "We agree on very little. We agree on this." </p>
<p><span class="font_large">This seemingly innocent comment made me realize two important things. </span></p>
<p>#1. I don't get political on my page. I intentionally don't post anything of an argumentative vein. I do openly support diversity, the arts, and science, which apparently offers insight into my politic leanings. Honestly though,<em> neither one of us fully knows what the other believes. </em></p>
<p>#2. <em>I bet we agree on a great many thing</em>s, not just the cuteness factor of baby goats. I value a lot of things the average human values: kindness, cooperation, safety, happiness, honesty, integrity, the importance of family (whatever your definition of that may be), learning, the ability to make a living, etc. I speculate that we could find more things we agree on than not. The problem arises when we read too much into those values or add our own personal context. My valuing learning can be construed into my valuing education, which would be accurate. My valuing learning could also be construed into my looking down on those who are not educated, which would not be accurate. </p>
<p><span class="font_large">I'm seeing these concepts playing out on the business stage as well. </span></p>
<p>People can categorize colleagues, seeing politics as the single defining factor of who they are as individuals. There can be the misconception that everyone around you has the same ideology as yourself, especially if the company culture is particularly liberal or conservative, causing employees to feel free to talk politics in the office. This may attract like-minded colleagues, but it may have the opposite effect on others. </p>
<p>In the current political climate of divisiveness, society is focusing on what separates us rather than what we have in common. The best business practices prioritize collaborating towards a common goal. Having a covert (or openly) politically divisive culture at work is going to hurt your bottom line. </p>
<p><span class="font_large">What are your leadership options as we head into this upcoming election? </span></p>
<p><strong>Model and enforce predetermined office culture</strong>. What's your culture policy on politics in the office? Follow it to the letter and call out those, kindly and in private, who don't (if you are in a leadership position). Point out the reasons for the policy and remind them that the work environment needs to be a place that focuses on a common goal. Make sure you are modeling the appropriate behavior since actions speak louder than words. For you to really lead people, this has to be something you believe deep down. </p>
<p><strong>Remind employees of expectations. </strong>Be proactive. Don't wait until something inappropriate is said or done and you have to react.</p>
<p><span class="font_large">What if you don't have a predetermined office culture? </span></p>
<p>It's not too late! In fact, it may be the perfect time to <strong>get your team together for a respectful discussion on culture</strong>. Relate this to your mission statement and your company's values. Call in a culture expert (like me!) to help. </p>
<p><span class="font_large">What if you have very strong political convictions? </span></p>
<p><strong>Define your professional self as opposed to your social self</strong>. You should have a business persona that you've intentionally constructed. This is separate from your social personality and personal culture. Decide what's appropriate behavior in business versus what's appropriate behavior socially. </p>
<p>Diversity of ideas is such an asset in business. You don't want to alienate those who believe differently than you do. </p>
<p>You want all your employees to feel respected and safe at work. </p>
<p>You want everyone to come together for the benefit of all (and the company!). </p>
<p>Don't let politics wreck rapport! </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64321992020-09-12T15:32:36-06:002020-09-12T15:34:12-06:00Leading in Uncertain Times<p>Are you or your team experiencing all-time high levels of anxiety and stress? </p>
<p>I wouldn’t be surprised. These are unprecedented times. </p>
<p>An uncertain future is a breeding ground for anxiety. Even a well-planned vision may not be enough to quench underlying stress and insecurity. All the well-intentioned time-management strategies or tools to manage overwhelm may only be scratching the surface. </p>
<p><em>This is a time when strong leadership is needed the most. </em></p>
<p><u>Use the following steps in my 4 Cs method for leadership in uncertain times to help you navigate the current climate: </u></p>
<p><strong>Consistency </strong></p>
<p>A pedagogy teacher once told me that is was alright, even desirable, for students to be caught off-guard and not know what to expect. That is not an approach I would recommend for success in education or in business. </p>
<p>When people know where they stand, they have more energy to apply to work. The insecurity of working for a wild-card or loose-canon type of manager only creates more stress. When employees experience consistency in leadership, they don’t have to waste time wondering if they’ve unknowingly misinterpreted something. They can focus more clearly on the task at hand. </p>
<p>Be the kind of leader whose employees know where they stand and, therefore, have appropriate expectations based on the cumulative experience of working for you. </p>
<p><em>Consistency in your actions, behaviors, and character will be a grounding factor in an ungrounded world. </em></p>
<p> </p>
<p><strong>Communication </strong></p>
<p>Uncertainty makes for a distracted brain. </p>
<p>Times of uncertainty require you to streamline communications. </p>
<p>Streamline meetings by increasing planning time and double-checking the meeting personnel list to make sure no one’s time is wasted. </p>
<p>Simplify correspondence. Be clear and concise. Over-communicate outcome expectations without micromanaging. </p>
<p><em>Listening is the most undervalued aspect of communication today. </em></p>
<p>Listen to what your employees are telling you. Make them feel heard. Consider context. Pay attention to body language and speech patterns. </p>
<p> </p>
<p><strong>Compassion </strong></p>
<p>Every point of contact needs to be tempered with compassion and understanding that everyone’s best may not be what it used to be pre-pandemic. Outcomes may need more time and energy. </p>
<p><em>Your human workforce is your greatest asset. </em></p>
<p>Ask your team what they need from you right now to do their job, and then really listen to their replies. </p>
<p>If you are unable to listen with compassion to the feedback you receive, practice compassion with yourself. Do whatever healing or self-care you need to do before engaging. Model the self-care your employees need to be practicing. You need to lead the way. </p>
<p><strong>Connection </strong></p>
<p>Connect with your team on a personal level and genuinely care for their well-being. </p>
<p>Be human. </p>
<p>Long-term goals or visions may be difficult to realize in uncertain times. Explore how to relate that vision in shorter terms, be it in chunks of achievement or in a series of smaller timelines. </p>
<p><em>Help your team connect the big picture to the smaller building blocks to decrease overwhelm. </em></p>
<p>We’re all in this together. The pandemic and remote working may create a sense of isolation. It’s your job to create a feeling of connection. If you’re at a loss for how to go about doing this, ask your team what they need to feel connected. </p>
<p>And then really listen to what they have to say. </p>
<p> </p>Dr. Nancy Williamstag:drnancywilliams.com,2005:Post/64132242020-08-19T20:35:56-06:002020-08-19T20:38:42-06:00Burnout Culture is Killing Productivity<p>If you think you or someone on your team is starting to get burnt out, it’s not a red flag. It’s a warning siren. When you’ve gotten to that point, productivity is already impacted long term. </p>
<p><span class="font_regular"><span style="color:null;"><em>Your burnout has probably already affected family and friends, not to mention one of your greatest assets, your relationship with yourself. </em></span></span></p>
<p>With the pandemic, the school year starting, a divisive election in the works, and racial inequality, it’s a banner season for stressors. So why do we expect the same productivity output? Culture change takes energy. Making sure our family’s basic needs are met right now is demanding center stage in our brain. (Thanks, Maslow for making us aware of our hierarchy of needs!) </p>
<p>I know all too well the long-term toll burnout takes on a life. As a musician and educator, I’ve toyed with burnout most of my career, from pushing through to the end of the semester to pulling out all the stops for a recital. Sure, I’d have to take a weekend or a month or a summer to recover, but that’s what everyone does, right? </p>
<p>Last summer, I played with burnout too much and lost…big time. After putting on a clarinet festival with a colleague and having most of my dissertation left to write (on top of already completing four years of grueling doctoral work), I was mentally paralyzed. </p>
<p>I decided to recover as much as I could and forge forward. I feared that if I didn’t complete my degree that fall, I might never finish it. Fast forward to January, and I have my doctorate, but at what cost? I was emotionally, mentally, and physically exhausted. </p>
<p>My brain wasn’t working right, my body was a mess, and I was in a perpetual state of resentment. I often found myself at a loss for the right word (such as calling an aquarium a water zoo), and I even caught myself unable to recall my own address. I joked to others that I’d used all my words in my dissertation, but it wasn’t funny. </p>
<p>I wasn’t the only one making light of burnout. For example, I remember hearing a student once humble brag about not having time to take a shower. Grad school felt like a competition to see who could sacrifice the most. </p>
<p>Burnout isn’t something to humble brag about. It’s time to put the oxygen mask on your face first (thanks, airline industry!) and practice radical selfcare. The resulting lack of productivity is long term. Months later, I can still feel the effects. The toll it took on my life and my relationships is evident in a hundred little ways and still some big ones. </p>
<p><span class="font_regular"><em>Burnout culture places a priority on short-term productivity, consequences be damned, while sacrificing long-term productivity and quality of life. </em></span></p>
<p>So what do you do as a leader to make a dent in burnout culture? As a culture consultant and coach, I’m seeing concerned team leaders and employers having discussions about self-care, allowing more time off, and providing their employees with helpful resources. </p>
<p>Those things are all great, but if you aren’t modeling selfcare, they could just be lip service. You can’t simply tell people; you must show them and hold them accountable. </p>
<p>Are you demanding selfcare? </p>
<p>Is it a weekly deliverable? </p>
<p>Are you proving how important it is by practicing it yourself? </p>
<p>Mindset matters, too. Do you really believe burnout is a productivity killer or do you secretly value a burnout badge of honor? If you think people won’t notice, think again. </p>
<p>If you are struggling with burnout yourself, don’t wait for permission to make radical changes in your work and lifestyle. Believe me, the long-term effects aren’t worth it. </p>
<p>These are difficult times for sure, but they are providing us with an opportunity to re-evaluate burnout culture. Embrace this opportunity and make real and lasting change, inside and out. </p>Dr. Nancy Williams